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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people are exercising less. Some people say that by watching major sport events on television such as the Olympics, people can be encouraged to exercise. Others say there are other ways to encourage people to exercise. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sport #events #television #olympics #exercise
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The importance of
exercise
Use synonyms
 cannot be over-emphasized. While some people are of the perception that viewing core sport programmes on television screens will motivate people to work out more, others think there are other methods to make people do so. I,
however
Linking Words
, support the latter for a number of reasons.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, those that say by watching sports people will engage in it more say so because nowadays people tend to aggravate towards and do what their icons do.
This
Linking Words
 is because they see them as role models and want to attain the level of agility and activity that they possess
such
Linking Words
 that it will make them less sedentary in nature. A good example is a
teenage
a juvenile between the onset of puberty and maturity
teenager
 who recently got signed up by a popular football club, when interviewed, he said he picked up the interest after watch Ronaldo on screen
hence
Linking Words
 consistently exercising to practice and perform better.
This
Linking Words
 is to show the impact that aired sport events have on people.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, I believe that periodical health campaigns and charity fund-raising walks will make people
exercise
Use synonyms
 more.
Firstly
Linking Words
, by making people know their numbers, with respect to blood test values for pressure, glucose and lipids, people will be more aware of their health and be more intentional about their lifestyle when they know that engaging in
exercise
Use synonyms
 will reduce sedentary levels.
In addition
Linking Words
, fund-raising walks will make people
exercise
Use synonyms
 more because when people find a cause which they are passionate about and would mean them soliciting for funds through walks, they will definitely participate in it.
For
Linking Words
example is
Accept comma addition
example, is
 renovating an old town hall. In conclusion, I do not agree that watching important sport programmes
such
Linking Words
 as FIFA that are aired on television screens would make people
work-out
the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit
workout
worked
more but
Accept comma addition
more, but
 health campaigns and awareness as well as fun-raising walks will help.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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