The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?

Every year governments allocate a large portion of the budget to the
health
department to provide better
treatment
facilities to the public.
However
, some diseases can be prevented if people take some measurement. In my opinion,
government
priority should be the
treatment
of
public but
Accept comma addition
public, but
cannot ignore the prevention of
health
problems.
First
of all, every year, scientists and researchers discover new diseases and viruses, some diseases can easily transmit from animals to human. Some diseases need proper
treatment
and medicine once they diagnosed,
for instance
, HIV and Cancer which need high levels of medication and a person cannot afford it without
government
support. So
treatment
and medicine should be the top priority of the
government
.
On the other hand
, some diseases and viruses can easily tickle if the
government
takes some initiatives about spreading awareness in the public. In daily life before eating anything people should wash their hands, they can use Sanitiser in working place. In the past, there were few diseases which
were life threatening to
Suggestion
were life threatening
human
health
, but with the
government
help it is almost disappeared,
For example
, the Pakistan
government
started a campaign about polio virus and eventually it reduced to 2%, same happened in India the
government
launched a campaign against cigarette smoking in all the train station and bus station to stop people from smoking which can cause lung cancer and
this
campaign was fruitful. To conclude, the
government
should continue the funding to
health sector
Suggestion
the health sector
, but at the same time spread awareness about preventing
health
problems and illnesses.
Submitted by samadk165 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: