It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as the South Pole. Do the advantages of the development outweigh the disadvantages?

As technology has developed, it allows scientists and tourists to visit to
remote natural
Suggestion
the remote natural environment
environment
. While it has many benefits to some extents, I would argue that the drawbacks are more significant.  
On the other hand
, scientists have more opportunities to observe wild animal
behaviors
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
behaviours
closely.
For instance
, scientists can observe wild penguin in
South Pole
Suggestion
the South Pole
, which they can study the penguin custom and
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
. After the study, scientists can share their information to others and expand their knowledge.
Moreover
, it seems
travel
to other cities are too common for some people and it may develop a new income for
travel
companies. Tourists can
travel
to the rainforest in
Amazon
Suggestion
the Amazon
, which can experience a totally difference of adventure.
However
, these
tourisms
an obvious truth
truisms
are always expensive and only a minority of people can afford it.   Tourists
are not only need
Suggestion
do not only need
are not only needed
to pay high expenditure to
travel
to
remote natural
Suggestion
the remote natural environment, but
the remote natural environment but
environment
but they
also
need to prepare equipment.
For example
, the temperature in
South Pole
Suggestion
the South Pole
is relatively low,
therefore
, people need to prepare enough clothes.
Also
, the risk to visit to
remote natural
Suggestion
the remote natural environment
environment
is high, people should own adequate knowledge to deal with urgent problems.
Furthermore
, more and more people
travel
to
remote natural
Suggestion
the remote natural environment
environment
would affect the living
environment
of wild animal. In fact, many tourists threw rubbish in
South Pole
Suggestion
the South Pole
and it has polluted the
environment
.
Therefore
, I do believe that the disadvantages of the development are
outweigh
Suggestion
outweighing
the advantages.   To conclude, the benefits of
travel
to
remote natural
Suggestion
the remote natural environment
environment
are very attractive,
however
, people need to concern more the
environment
Suggestion
environmental
pollution of wild animal to protect their living area.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: