One of the consequences of improved medical care is that the people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, people are enjoying longer
life
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and
expectancy
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of
life
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is increasing
by
Suggestion
with
each passing day due to improvements in
health department
Suggestion
the health department
. I believe there are more positive aspects of
this
Linking Words
modification than its drawbacks.
To begin
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with, one of the main negative effect of
longer
Suggestion
a longer life
life
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is that it
will increased
Suggestion
will increase
the number of over aged population which will directly become a headache for the governments.
For example
Linking Words
, old people get retirement when they reach to a certain age and after that they do not able to work and living their
life
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on the pension which is
pay
Suggestion
paid
by the governments.
Moreover
Linking Words
, as people live longer and do not work the government have to bear the expense for a handful time and must provide fundamental facilities like free medical or provide accommodation and become a burden.
This
Linking Words
is why, extensive
life
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and higher
life
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expectancy
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is a dilemma for the
world
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, living
long
Suggestion
longer
and rise in
life
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expectancy
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has
myriad
Suggestion
a myriad
of benefits.
As a result
Linking Words
of optimized medical techniques human are living for a long time and their
life
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expectancy
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has extended which gives opportunity to the people to work after the retirement as well and due to
this
Linking Words
reason some countries has enhanced the age limit for the retirement.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, longer
life
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will help the
world
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by different means which will be helpful for the
world
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to be a better place to live.
For instance
Linking Words
, old people have more experience and understanding they can use their skills as a lecturer or
scientist
Suggestion
a scientist
. Because of above mentioned reasons having a long
life
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and higher
expectancy
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rate is beneficial for the
world
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. In summation,
although
Linking Words
there are some disadvantage of the
lengthy
Suggestion
longest
lifespan and more
life
Use synonyms
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expectancy but
Accept comma addition
expectancy, but
advantages
Suggestion
the advantages
are more than disadvantages. I believe, it is a blessing for the
world
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to have long
life
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time and low mortality
rate which
Accept comma addition
rate, which
will improve the quality of
life
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in the
world
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.
Accept space
.
Submitted by rehan.malik0787 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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