IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#governments #progress #people #country
Opinion has been divided on whether or not economic growth is the most essential target for a
country
 to achieve. While some argue that the economy is the only significant aspect that the authority should pay attention to, I firmly hold that there are several elements to be considered while evaluating the development of a nation. There are some apparent reasons why people might claim that economic progress outweighs other components to be the only fundamental goal for countries. The
first
 to mention is that a growing economy may bring about job creation, thereby the increase in the employment rate and the improvement in the average salaries of employees.
Secondly
, the economic advance possibly allows the
country
 to consolidate its position in the international arena, concluded political, social and trading influences.
Finally
, without a sustainable economy, infrastructure and public services may fail to grow utterly since the budget would be too tight for the authority to run advanced methods, especially when the considerable advance in technology affects most aspects of people’s lives, which requires large amounts of money. Despite the preceding arguments, I support the view that various other factors are as crucial as the economic progress when estimating the improvement of a community. An indispensable target that a nation should meet is education, which is widely regarded as the basic standard of humanity. A comprehensive education system will likely enable citizens to get satisfying jobs, which means the state may reduce the unemployment rate and various offences.
Moreover
, health status is
also
 a vital element in inhabitants’ living standard,
in other words
, if residents have excellent medical care, they possibly make a valuable contribution towards the improvement of the
country
.
For example
, regions enduring severe epidemics
such
 as Ebola and MERS cannot develop as those having great health care systems. In conclusion, economic growth has an important role to play in the development of a
country
, but I believe that the government should regard various aspects like education or health systems as significant targets to meet.
Submitted by TTC on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
What to do next:
Look at other essays: