In some countries, people follow the latest fashion and hairstyles. In your opinion, what is influencing this? Is this a good or bad thing?

#countries #people #fashion #hairstyles

These days, nation from certain countries prefer to abide the new

exlusive

not divided or shared with others

exclusive

explosive

clothes and

hairstyles

. In my opinion,

this

is clearly evident that some countries compete each other and wants to be

first

each sphere, so

fashion

is not

exception

Suggestion

exceptional

. With modern world

fashion

develop together and develop very well, while there are some gap where should be improved before getting worse. No secret, that everyone loves

fashion each of

Suggestion

fashion, each of

us wants to wear a good costume or dress and wants to be individual, unique and smart. To track by latest

fashion

and hairstyle is not criminal,

on the

contrary

Accept comma addition

contrary, this

this

is more opportunity in order to show that you are

intellegent

having the capacity for thought and reason especially to a high degree

intelligent

and

elegent

refined and tasteful in appearance or behavior or style

elegant

. If a person going to an interview, the person

defenetly

without question and beyond doubt

definitely

defiantly

wants to impress interviewers not only by knowledge, dress and hairstyle as well.

Meanwhile clothes

Accept comma addition

Meanwhile, clothes

will describe who you are, attitude to yourself if the person is tiny it means that his approach to the work will be similar accurate and more attentive.

Fashion

occupied certain countries and for them

fashion

main income

Suggestion

the main income

a main income

to the budget.

On the other hand

, that

fashion

sector became worse and worse. Designers making

such

design clothes

where

have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)

were

less material more naked

mody

relating to a recently developed fashion or style

mod

moody

. Audience

precieve

Suggestion

preserves

preserve

perceive

that kind of idea repulsive, namely

elder generation

Suggestion

the elder generation

and certain

yound

(used of living things especially persons) in an early period of life or development or growth

young

generation. As far as parents concerned growing generation will get those

type

Suggestion

types

of clothes as normal for routine and lose the value of the clothes.

Nevertheless

fashion

industries and

hairstyles

develope

make something new, such as a product or a mental or artistic creation

develop

and got own place in these

life

Suggestion

lives

. In conclusion, every industry should be moderately creative,

otherwise

fashion

sectors and

hairstyles

will be over creative. Each clothes should be made tasty and thin same as

hairstyles

Submitted by issagali90 on Mon Sep 30 2019

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some countries, people follow the latest fashion and hairstyles. In your opinion, what is influencing this? Is this a good or bad thing?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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A lot of people have become dependent on technology as it plays a big role in our daily lives. Do you agree that living in computer age has more advantages than disadvantages?

in the future all cars, buses, and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.

Mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries and shops and on public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree?