Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

#television #free-time #people

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

After a few decades

Accept space

television

Use synonyms

shows had improved so much which connected

closeknit

Suggestion

close knit

to human life. People spend

hour

Suggestion

an hour

hours

and hour front of

television

Use synonyms

.So

This

Linking Words

situation makes us become tired of working

further

Linking Words

human's relationship goes down. At we start,

television

Use synonyms

makes people lazy and less

time

Use synonyms

for

sociallising

the act of meeting for social purposes

socializing

socialising

with others. For instant, people used to

spent

Suggestion

spend

their spare

time

Use synonyms

for family in the old days before the invention of

television

Use synonyms

appears. Now most of our

time

Use synonyms

using for watching

entertainment showcast

Suggestion

the entertainment showcase

entertainment showcase

an entertainment showcase

entertainment showcases

and staying away each others.

In which makes relationship

Suggestion

Which makes the relationship

In which makes the relationship

between human and human goes badly.

For example

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is real

case

events that provide the generative force that is the origin of something

cause

refers to the speaker or writer

had seen

in my neigbhour

Suggestion

my neighbour

in my neighbour

Robbers

Suggestion

The robbers

got inside my

grandmother'house

the mother of your father or mother

grandmothers

and took one of my motorbike in the way so easy

inspite

Suggestion

happended

come to pass

happened

in the afternoon.

Suggestion

contrast,

television

Use synonyms

provide

Suggestion

provides

many

value

Suggestion

valuable

informations

a message received and understood

information

around the

world but

Accept comma addition

world, but

we don't have to go out.Many study programmes for

student

Suggestion

the student

students

is free on

television

Use synonyms

or document about history life

Accept space

seesighting

Suggestion

Accept space

people

also

Linking Words

television

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

Accept space

limiting the

time

Use synonyms

on using

time

Use synonyms

for watching

television

Use synonyms

good thing

Suggestion

a good thing

to begin

Linking Words

with. In my conclusion,

refers to the speaker or writer

'd like to agree with the statement about using too much

time

Use synonyms

for

television

Use synonyms

is not only make people lazy but

also

Linking Words

spend less

time

Use synonyms

for

sociallising

the act of meeting for social purposes

socializing

socialising

with others.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, risky from lazy connect with many diseases

such

Linking Words

obeity

more than average fatness

obesity

Accept space

stress

Accept space

less creation

Suggestion

less creative

and more.Human should spend more

time

Use synonyms

for other activities and social life

instead

Linking Words

of staying at home

Accept space

Submitted by thucnguyen0306 on Tue Oct 08 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

239 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In the advancement of technology era, children are common to own a smartphone where they tend to spend much time on that thing. This is affected by particular reason and carries drawback issue as I will explain in the following paragraphs.
5.5
band
Nowadays, stress-related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?
Recently, mental health issues have risen in our society, including stress. It is commonly reported that more individuals suffer from health problems due to stress. There are two vocal reasons causing this problem and some measures need to be taken to solve it.
5.5
band
Some people argue that mass media only bring negative effect to society and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Certain people think that mass media don’t bring chaos to society and shouldn’t be banned. I agree with the extent that people should know the ethical rules in mass media.
5
band
Air transport is increasingly used to export fruit and vegetables to countries where they cannot be grown or are out of season. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
There is an increasing trend of using aeroplane to transport fruit and vegetables from one country to another where they do not produce or are out of season. The benefit of transporting fruit and vegetable is people easily have those and their nutrient value. Moreover, the drawback is exporting fruit and vagetables causes a lot of food wastage, because they have to preserve for so long for export.
7
band
In the past, knowledge was stored in books. Today, people stored knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages??
Nowadays, due to the advancement of technology, people store their information and knowledge on the Internet, while in the past traditional methods were used.In this essay both sides of the argument will be discussed and the support will be explained.

Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays, stress-related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Some people argue that mass media only bring negative effect to society and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Air transport is increasingly used to export fruit and vegetables to countries where they cannot be grown or are out of season. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

In the past, knowledge was stored in books. Today, people stored knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages??