IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #media #privacy #price #fame #invasion #life
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there is a talk that famous people are not being handled well by the media. Some say intimate space must be given to their personal
life
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, others think it is about the cost of their popularity which is more towards their personal
life
Use synonyms
. Let’s discuss both sides. On one side, some news and information which are not true about a popular personality comes through media easily and
this
Linking Words
 makes people think wrongly about the person. The primary thing is there should be no proper media coverage or any false news unless the information is truly verified. They should be given some space and right towards their personal
life
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, there was false news in
media
Suggestion
the media
 about a person recently in American Politics mentioning he was having black money and didn’t pay the government taxes properly. But after several investigations, it has been proved wrong. On the other side, People who are popular in any field are paid higher or they get revenues from various resources. Their personalities and popularity get changed easily. Media will not be quiet and go deep into their personal
life
Use synonyms
. So there is a hunger for Social media to make their personal increase in TRP by invading more about the personal
life
Use synonyms
 of celebrities.
For Example
Linking Words
, there was a survey recently mentioning the highly paid actors in the cinema industry. Media went into more personal information by fiddling into their assets. To conclude, there will always be discussions going over famous personalities.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion, the famous
people
Suggestion
person's
 intimacy should not be touched to an extent. It should be in
such
Linking Words
 a way that it does not create any negative opinion.
Submitted by vickyramanathan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: