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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people think that sharing information freely will benefit in scientific research, business and academic world. However, others think some information is too important or too valuable to be shared. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #information #benefit #research #business #world
Some
information
 requires a careful handling as the misuse of sensitive data can negatively impact on individuals. While some people believe that sharing
information
 without a restriction benefits the advancement in various fields
such
 as science, business and education, others concern of
such
 practice as some
information
 is highly important and valuable.
This
 essay will discuss both views and explain the reasons why I think the access to
information
 should be regulated. There are some potential advantages of sharing
information
.
Firstly
, it can reduce the budget and
time
 of research.
For example
, the cost of clinical research is extremely expensive and
time
 consuming in general.
However
, if the result of research is shared between organisations across the world, not only it saves
time
 and expense of an experiment, but
also
 it stimulates innovation and growth within the field.
Secondly
, it benefits the whole society by providing latest knowledge and skills.
Thus
, having access to the latest resource is
time
 and cost efficient, while advocating the development of the specific field.
On the other hand
, some data may contain sensitive data
such
 as social and medical status of an individual. If the personal data was accessed by a
third
 party who intend to use it for their own interest, the individual may sacrifice from fraud or disadvantages in social life.
For instance
, a bank or an insurance company may obtain to the personal
information
 of an individual, and take advantage of the data to make a profit by not allowing the person to claim benefits, unless
otherwise
 accessible.
Hence
, not everyone should be able to reach valuable data to protect individuals. To conclude, while the free access to
information
 possibly contributes to saving hours and cost, as well as stimulating development in the specific field, some regulations are required to protect sensitive
information
 from an external party with a harmful intention.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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