IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?

There is an opinion that
relocating
Suggestion
relocates
is relocating
 large
scales
Suggestion
scale
 businesses
such
Linking Words
 as companies, industrial organizations and the people working for them
to
Suggestion
in
 the rural area could help reduce
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion and accommodation issues.
However
Linking Words
, I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 viewpoint because as much as people still commute to
work
Use synonyms
 on a daily basis and the number of vehicles that apply on the
road
Use synonyms
 does not reduce,
traffic
Use synonyms
 and housing challenges will not be resolved.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
although
Linking Words
 movies factories would create more space to build more houses for people to live, commuting daily to the rural area where they
work
Use synonyms
 still results to
traffic
Use synonyms
 in peak hours.
This
Linking Words
 means that employees who
work
Use synonyms
 in these remote areas would
had
Suggestion
have
 to face the hassle of being stuck on their way to
work
Use synonyms
. In Anambra State,
for example
Linking Words
, people live in Onitsha while they
work
Use synonyms
 in Umuchu factories. Despite these
factory
Suggestion
factories
 is
inside
Suggestion
in
 a village, there is still house shortages in town and
also
Linking Words
,
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestions every morning and evening which
causes
Suggestion
cause
 stress to the employee. Clearly, relocating the industries did not solve
traffic
Use synonyms
 and
accomodation
making or becoming suitable; adjusting to circumstances
accommodation
 issues.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, provided the people
continues
Suggestion
continue
are continuing
 buying cars to help them transport conveniently,
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestions will not reduce.
In other words
Linking Words
, the
road
Use synonyms
 will not contain the same volume of cars in
transit which
Accept comma addition
transit, which
 it
initially
Linking Words
 contains even if companies are relocated. To illustrate,
survey
Suggestion
the survey
 shows that there is an increase in sales of automobiles and car owners confirmed that the primary aim of buying cars is to ease stress especially while going to
work
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, increasing the
traffic
Use synonyms
 on the
road
Use synonyms
 despite relocating large scale businesses. In conclusion, I
strong
Suggestion
strongly
 refute the idea that moving companies and industries to
romote
located far away spatially
remote
promote
 areas would reduce
traffic
Use synonyms
 and housing shortages. Provided people have to go to
work
Use synonyms
 on a daily basis and the number of
vehicle
Suggestion
vehicles
 on the
road
Use synonyms
 is on the increase
,
Accept space
,
then
Linking Words
 there will be
traffic
Use synonyms
 and house shortages.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
that is
Linking Words
 not the solution to the problem.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • housing problems
  • countryside
  • large companies
  • factories
  • employees
  • urban areas
  • land availability
  • relocate
  • stimulate economic development
  • challenges
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • rural areas
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