Many animals are facing extinction in the wild. Why is this happening? What can be done to protect them?

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The depreciation of the ecosystem has been a major concern recently. And worthy of notice is the alarming reduction of wild animals.

This

Linking Words

essay will analyse the causes of

this

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worrisome trend which include rapid urbanisation of rural areas and proliferation of

game

Use synonyms

hunters and proffer possible solutions to abate

this

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problem. Turning to the causes of extinction of wild animals.

Firstly

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, rapid urbanisation of

rural area

Suggestion

the rural area

rural areas

is an important one.

For instance

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, with overcrowding in the cities, people now move en masse to settle down in

countrysides

Suggestion

the countrysides

This

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form of migration as

seen

Suggestion

is seen

in Alaska, where owls were

annhilated

destroyed completely

annihilated

often leads to encroachment of the ecological niche of these animals and subsequent deforestation in order to get

timbers

Suggestion

the timbers

to build houses and furnitures.

Consequently

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, wild animals tend to suffer and eventually die due to failure of

acclimatisation

Suggestion

the acclimatisation

of new habitat.

In addition

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increase

Suggestion

an increase

in the number of

game

Use synonyms

hunters is another issue.

This

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was established in eastern

Australia

Accept comma addition

Australia, for

for example

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, where

game

Use synonyms

hunters were solely fingered in the extinction of Koala, a tree-dwelling bear. Despite the above challenges, there are possible means to protect these animals. Perhaps the most important is the creation of

menagerie

Suggestion

the menagerie

. A case in point is the national

game

Use synonyms

reserve in Nairobi, which has greatly contributed to the conservation of animals like giraffes, zebras and ostriches.

Also

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, enforcement of penalties for deforestation.

This

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plan

Accept comma addition

plan, for

for

Linking Words

example has

Accept comma addition

example, has

been of benefit in Nigeria, where indiscriminate felling of trees is rampant. And as

such

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

act was criminalised and culprits are made to pay huge fines or sentence to jail thereby curbing the menace. In conclusion,

this

Linking Words

essay explained the reasons behind

annihilation

Suggestion

the annihilation

quarry which

Suggestion

the quarry, which

the quarry which

a quarry which

quarries which

include the increase rate of migration from urban to countrysides and the negative impacts of hunters. And solutions of zoological gardens and outlawing of deforestation.

Submitted by oladyplenty1 on Thu Oct 17 2019

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Many animals are facing extinction in the wild. Why is this happening? What can be done to protect them?

The best way to improve health is to exercise daily. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

in some countries, more and more people are becoming intrested in finding out about the history of the houses or building they live in. what are the reasons for this? how can people research this?

in some countries , owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negetive situation

Many people believe that formal 'pen and paper' examinations are not the best method of assessing educational achievement. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.