The chart below shows the number of travellers using three major airports in New York City between 1995 to 2000.

The chart below shows the number of travellers using three major airports in New York City between 1995 to 2000.
The bar chart illustrates the
number
of three major airports
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
being used by visitors in New York
city
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City
show examples
from
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between
show examples
1995 and 2000 In 1995, the
number
of passengers using John
F.Kennedy
Correct your spelling
F. Kennedy
were
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was
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more than 20
Add the preposition
ofmillions
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millions
Correct your spelling
million
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people. The
number
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
35
millions
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million
show examples
in 1996, and
continure
Correct your spelling
continue
increased
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to increase
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to nearly 50
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
passengers using
this
major airport in 1997. But John F.kennedy
haf
Correct your spelling
have
had
decreased in the
next
year – in 1998 . In 1999, there were about 32
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people using
this
major. In 2000 , the
number
has blown up to 23
millions
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million
show examples
. The passenger using LaGuardia in 1995 was about 35
milions
Correct your spelling
millions
million
miles
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and increased
ti
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
39 nukkuns in 1996. The
number
wasn’t down till 1997 , it’s
continue
Wrong verb form
continued
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to
reached
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reach
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
42
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
passengers . In 1998 , there were 48
millions
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million
show examples
traverllers
Correct your spelling
travellers
using LaGuardia , and the
number
had up to 50
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
in 1999 and
Correct your spelling
raised
rose
rise
rised
Correct your spelling
rose
show examples
to nearly 70 million in 2000 Newark had 15
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
passenger in 1995, and the
number
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased to 25 million in 1996. IN 1997, there were 38
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people using
this
major airport. The
number
Correct your spelling
rose
raised
rises
rised
Correct your spelling
rose
show examples
to 42
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
in 1998, and
this
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
the
number
of
passenger
Change to a plural noun
passengers
show examples
using Newark in 1999 and 2000
Submitted by ganesha.gilcentre on

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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, millions with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "rised" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • significant increase
  • highest number
  • steady increase
  • largest growth
  • dramatic
  • slowest growth
  • slight decrease
  • gradual increase
  • period
  • travelers
  • major airports
  • followed by
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