IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

in many countries nowadays,consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In the contemporary world, people have the easy option to purchase a range of
food
Use synonyms
products
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 that are cultivated in other countries or continents from a superstore.
Although
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 there are a group of people who believe it will harm the producer of the home country
due to
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high
Correct article usage
the high
show examples
 price competitiveness of the same
products
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 imported, in my opinion, it creates an avenue for the consumers to have a vast range of
products
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 at a reasonable price and access to those
products
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 that are rare in the home country. On the one hand, it is not practical to grow all the
products
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 in a country
due to
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 several reasons. The most challenging reason is the different weather conditions in the northern and southern hemispheres.
For instance
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, in
Europe
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Europe,
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 there are prolonged winter seasons throughout the year which are not suitable for growing certain
food
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 grains,
such
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 as rice, maize, and sorghum. But thanks to globalization that makes global trade easier, people can get these
food
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 items in supermarkets in Europe.
Furthermore
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, labour costs in certain regions are high.
For example
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, the average hourly labour price in Europe and North America is more than double that of Asia and triple compared to Africa. So, superstores collect imported goods that would be more expensive if produced locally, and
thus
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, consumers get the benefit of lower prices.
Finally
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, some
food
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 items are related to cultural values, and they are often consumed by expatriates who live in foreign countries for work, where the demand for their home-grown items is generally higher.
In addition
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, the availability of
such
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products
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 in supermarkets can bring cultural diversification to a large extent;
for instance
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, one can consume apples in Bangladesh, even though they are not locally produced. In conclusion,
due to
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 globalization, households are now able to get a varied range of
food
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products
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 from superstores that are cultivated in different parts of the world.

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your main points. For instance, you could mention specific countries that produce certain foods and how their presence in supermarkets benefits consumers.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. You can use linking words like 'Additionally' or 'Furthermore' to make connections clearer.
task achievement
Your conclusion is good but can be more specific about why the variety of food is beneficial. You could summarize your key points to reinforce your argument.
task achievement
You have presented a clear opinion on the topic, stating that this development is positive for consumers.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction sets the context well and gives a clear overview of what the essay will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
The reasons you provided for the benefits of imported food are logical and relevant, showing an understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
What to do next:
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