At the present time, the population of some countries include a relative number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantage.

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

The quality of age groups

vary

Suggestion

varies

from one country to another.

Suggestion

recent

time

Suggestion

times

, most countries comprise of

increased population

Suggestion

the increased population

an increased population

of young adults when contrasted with the number of the aged. I believe

this

trend has more merits than the demerits that might come along with it.

admittedly

Suggestion

Admittedly

, a community or society with a lot of old people in it, always make a good decision that makes a positive impact on the status of the country in the long run.

This

is because the aged are presumed to be wealthy in knowledge, due to the plethora of experience accumulated over the years.

These

Suggestion

This

knowledge

are

Suggestion

essential in guiding the populace in making the right decision and

also

to avoid making the mistakes of the past.

however

Suggestion

However

, having more of older men and women than youths will decrease the economy of the community due to an increase independent population.

Thus

, a higher population of the aged might pose a great risk to the wealth of the nation.

On the other hand

, the economy of the country can be

boost

Suggestion

boosted

by having a greater number of young people compared to the old ones.

This

is because youths are considered to be energetic individual, who is constantly involved in new innovations.

This

is a common belief all around the globe and can be proven by contemporary achievement in the field of technology.

For instance

, the chief executive officer of many renowned companies

are owned

Suggestion

is owned

by middle-aged individuals,

such

as Dangote groups of companies owned by Alhaji Dangote and Ford is created by Henry Ford.

Therefore

, these innovations will

consequently

increase the financial status of the world through

independability

Suggestion

in dependability

of these youths. In conclusion, considering the positive influence of

young adults contribution

Suggestion

the young adults contribution

to society by new development and

independency

freedom from control or influence of another or others

independence

when contrasted with the aged, I believe that the advantage of

this

trend outweighs its disadvantages.

Hence

this

phenomenon should be encouraged.

Submitted by emmanuelotegbeye on Sat Oct 19 2019

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

317 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries include a relative number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantage.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that teachers should be able to ask distruptive children to leave the class. Do you think it is the best way to deal with distruptive children in the classroom? What other solutions are there?

A lot of social problems today are caused by teenagers. Many people believe this is because parents don’t spend enough time with them. Do you agree or disagree?

A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defence but spend less on social benefits. To what extent do you agree? Essay Outline

These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.