IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust
In recent times, wealth determines the capability of an individual. It gives us an image that, human beings are assessed based on their riches and their prominence, rather than based on their essential values
such
 as honesty and kindness as these seem to be far less necessary. I certainly agree with
this
 perception wherein whopping finances determine the status of an individual.
However
, I have some hesitations in completely accepting it.
This
 essay will discuss in detail about my opinion, which is slightly inclined towards the former. On the one hand, human life is reduced to making money surreptitiously. Most of us dislike to acknowledge
this
 phenomenon.
Furthermore
, the one who earns more, enjoys a monopoly over his business and so he is put on limelight for his repeated success over his rivals. He is considered as an inspiration for the rest of the youths to follow. His finances grow multi-fold with his name being spelled across all the global capitals.
For example
, Jeff Bezos became prominent ever since his company Amazon ruled the entire planet with virtual workspaces. His profits are more than that of the entire people’s finances on the planet.
Therefore
, we tend to get attracted by
such
 soft power rather looking at ingrained values.
On the other hand
, there are several people who stick to their noble values
such
 as kindness, honesty and integrity.
For example
, a company in South India had invented a way of converting plastic to combustible fuel in a legitimate way.
However
, their invention was arraigned and their ideas were stolen by people who want to make huge profits by selling the existing crude oil. Their intention was to maximise their profits by blocking the integral ideas and values.
Therefore
, honesty and kindness are considered as mostly dead. Thanks to the respiring judiciary, which gives us a bleak hope that these integral values are still appreciated. To recapitulate, making skyrocketing profits or achieving stardom is a luxury which not all can replicate. We need to appreciate the way they made a success and imbibe it to our life, if it aligns with our moral values.
However
, by completely ignoring the legitimate values to achieve success will push us into an oblivion.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social status
  • Material possessions
  • Old-fashioned values
  • Honour
  • Kindness
  • Trust
  • Judged
  • Importance
  • Traditional
  • Reflection
  • Achievements
  • Hard work
  • Disregarded
  • Well-balanced
  • Meaningful
  • Cultural norms
  • Societal norms
What to do next:
Look at other essays: