In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

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Introduction

One of the endemic, harsh household duties for advance generations was going shopping;

however

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, people now refer to

such

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activity as a pastime. In my opinion, despite

this

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bias may have some trivial drawbacks, the amount of its social benefits is noteworthy, in the modern lifestyle.

Body paragraph 1

From the perspective of positive impact, nowadays, people, either men or women, are tied up in their job,

thus

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, they hardly have sufficient

time

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to spend with their families.

Besides

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, there is a pile of chores concerning their household, which have to be done in their spare

time

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Therefore

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, the knock-on effect of shopping is that all family members have a chance to gather together and dispense with any anxieties purchasing their necessary pieces of stuff.

For example

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, offspring can play in the playground when their parents are buying in the storing mall; afterward, they can have dinner at the end of shopping; thanks to the provision of the leisure facilities in present malls, stores, and markets.

Body paragraph 2

From the minus side, it can be potential that youngsters compel their parents to pay out on the unnecessary things, or even unhealthy snacks,

such

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as candy, chips, which are perilous for frequent buyers.

This

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downside pales into insignificance, along with the profitable aspects. To illustrate more, the

last

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survey, held by the Yale University, reveals that happiness and having enjoyable activity, increase the life expectancy by 65%; as for,

this

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figure is far higher than the side effects of processed food.

Conclusion

In conclusion, some tasks

such

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as, shopping lose their severity, when

time

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goes by, and

this

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upheaval brings a load of benefits with it. Thereby, busy people from all walks of life have an opportunity to spend their shopping

time

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beside their families.

Oct 30, 2019

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
retail therapy
materialism
disposable income
economic growth
financial instability
environmental impact
social interaction
community building
emotional satisfaction
advertising influence
shopping habits

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