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Band 6.5

People should look after their health as a duty to the society they live rather than personal benefits. Agree or disagree?

#people #health #duty #society
It has been argued that many people nowadays should pay more attention on their
health
 to live longer and other personal benefits, for social responsibilities are still debated. In my point of view, I entirely agree with
this
 view because of the following reasons.
First
 of all, many people admit that achieving and maintaining good
health
 are the long-term solutions to enhance their happy life greatly. It can be explained that people who are in good shape work more effectively and ensure higher productivity, so they are able to secure higher living standards and move forward in the career ladder.
Besides
, it is clear that
health
 condition goes along with a psychological state,
therefore
 healthy people always feel energetic and excited when doing daily activities rather than the sluggish ones.
For example
, stress is an inevitable part of life, seven out of ten adults in the United States say they experience stress or anxiety daily, but they learn to manage mental pressure by making use of regular exercise or following a balanced diet to cope with stress (ADAA News).
Secondly
, it is an undeniable fact that the social responsibility should be considered by the residents to share the help hand with the government to limit the potential
health
 problems which may drag a country in economy, education and so on.
Furthermore
, an aging population will may not mean a great tax burden for working adults if people of retirement age who have a good
health
 to continue a productive working life, so the money comes from national budgets will need to be taken from other areas and spent on vital
health
 care.
For example
, by investing in old age, but good
health
 residents, and they are able to face the
third
 biggest economy in the world while Japan’s population is among the oldest on the planet and has one of the longest lifespans. Taking everything into consideration, it seems to me that each person should take their
health
 as a part of the sustainable growth of the country and as personal benefits.
Submitted by phuongkv4282 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • duty
  • well-being
  • burden
  • healthcare systems
  • productive
  • economy
  • example
  • empower
  • informed choices
What to do next:
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