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Band 7.5

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world
People’s opinions differ as to whether it is advisable for the world’s
information
 in many particular areas
such
 as scientific experiments, business activities and education to be encouraged to be shared worldwide.
However
, some assert that there exists
such
information
 that cannot be shared openly due to their paramount importance as well as indispensability. These two sides of the issue will be discussed as follows and I would like to suggest my own viewpoint In the
first
 place, there is a noticeable reason for the argument that
information
 in mentioned areas should widely spread. Particularly, from the perspective of individuals, by being able to be accessible to these fields’ knowledge, people will probably have a profound comprehension about the world’s affairs.
In other words
, the general public’s knowledge is likely to be enhanced significantly thanks to the widespread specific
information
.
For example
, in terms of business activities, investors would have a deeper understanding of where to invest their resources and capital to gain profits. Another example worth mentioning is that graduates would find it not as a burden when considering which career paths to pursue with readily available and sufficient
information
.
On the other hand
, I support the view that not all
information
 could be publicly used. The
first
 striking reason is that some kinds of
information
 are of top secret and confidential, which would be potentially detrimental if known by a great number of people.
Such
information
 related to a private business strategy or a destructive substance, if fallen into evil hands, would be manifestations of
this
.
In addition
, there exists a large amount of precious and invaluable knowledge or new findings with regards to science that scientists have tirelessly experimented to find out. These present their consistent efforts, industriousness for years, which cannot be easily disclosed to average people as they might take advantage of it
such
 as obtaining the patent possession. In conclusion, I am in all agreement with the idea that
information
 in some particular sectors should be capped at a certain level in order to avoid adverse consequences
Submitted by tungsau2421999 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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