Wealth does not necessarily guarantee happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, we have more tools to do business, grow our capital and look forward to having a better future, but that does not necessarily mean we can ensure joy. In

this

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essay, I will try to explain

further

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how having a big fortune is far from being the cause of happiness. There are many reasons why wealth tends to drift apart from being happy.

Firstly

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, it can be a burden when everything surrounding has been a product of stress and tears of pain.

Moreover

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, if all efforts are just to make more money, it can be rather easy to experience a turnaround and lose capital in seconds.

Secondly

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, the anxiety of having large amounts of money is a consequence of having to spend more of it to make it safe, take

for example

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the cost of having personal security and monthly payments to safely store cash in banks. Humans have evolved because of scarcity and danger. The more we don’t change, the more inclined we are to become lazy, which is why humans need motivation.

Therefore

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this

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is the main reason why we cannot compare bliss with wealth, because our minds cannot change the way they work, only because we have more or less money.

Furthermore

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, contentment has different forms of manifesting itself, like

for instance

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, there is so much joy in having everything and being able to share with others. To conclude, wealth can make all sorts of superficial and materialistic wishes come true, which is far from being the reason for our peace of mind. Is there anything else in the world that can replace a family dinner, watching the

first

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steps of your child or being there when your parents need you in the hospital?

Submitted by rafa.lascano on Fri Nov 15 2019

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Wealth does not necessarily guarantee happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Young people are often influenced in their behaviours and situations by other in the same age. This is called peer pressure. Do the disadvantages outweighed the advantages?

Being a celebrity- such as famous film star or sports personality – brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

People in many countries spend more and more time far away from their families. Why does this happen and what effects will it have on them and their families?

Many people these days have computer, laptops, telephones at their homes for work. Do you thibk, working from home has more advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons

With The Increasing Use And Development Of New Technology, Many Machine Are New Able To Do The Work Which People Used To Perform. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?