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Band 6.5

In the age of digital communication and social media, face-to-face interactions are becoming less common. Some people think that this is decreasing people’s ability to communicate well in person. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Obviously, in the heyday of the digital era, face-to-face
communication
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 is becoming less common.
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Although some
Correct word choice
Some
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people
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 suppose that
this
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 fact has a negative influence on
people
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’s ability to talk with each other in real life. On the one hand, I agree with the point of view that the widespread use of the Internet for chatting is causing major issues with coping with interaction. Daily use of
such
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 technology, as a rule, negatively impacts our social skills.
For example
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, during the COVID-19 pandemic, all students in the world relied on online lessons and socialized with each other only on the Internet.
As a result
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, a lot of
people
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 had difficulties communicating with peers and teachers sitting in the real classroom.
On the other hand
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, digital
communication
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also
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 has positive effects on the level of socialization.
For instance
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, plenty of students use different kinds of apps for studying, especially learning languages.
Moreover
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, digital technologies give us a chance to make new friends worldwide;
this
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 fact can broaden our minds and
way
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 of thinking. By the
way
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, in developed countries,
such
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 as the USA and China, online studying is becoming more effective than the traditional
way
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 to get a degree.
However
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, I cannot agree with
this
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 position. In my opinion, online studying will never be able to replace the offline
way
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 of getting new knowledge because
communication
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 in person, especially when you see the reactions of the
people
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 around you, is much more
favorable
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favourable
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 for social connections and personal interactions,
as well as
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 practical lessons learned together. In conclusion, digital
communication
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 occasionally has negative impacts,
such
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 as an inability to talk to other
people
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, but it is worth considering that it
also
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 has positive aspects.

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task achievement
Include a clearer thesis statement in your introduction to outline your main argument more explicitly.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph begins with a strong topic sentence that clearly relates to the main argument.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to strengthen your arguments, particularly in the positive aspects of digital communication.
content
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both positive and negative impacts of digital communication.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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