Some people believe that the Olympics Games do not have a role in the 21st Century. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your experience.

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It is often claimed that
people
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do not anymore perceive the
Olympic
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Games
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as important to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
Nevertheless
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, I believe that many
individuals
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these days still value the role of these
competitions
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in giving pride and honour to a country and in releasing patriotic emotions in a positive way. It is evident that many
individuals
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today still demonstrate the same degree of patriotism as they did in the past whenever the
Olympic
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Games
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are
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were
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held. Apparently, it might seem as though many have forgotten the value of these
competitions
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because technology has made significant inroads in many aspects of
people
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’s lives these days, taking their attention away from the world of sports and diverting it to other priorities.
However
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, these same advances in technology have
also
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enabled a larger audience to cheer for their teams and watch international sporting events more closely through live streaming channels, real-time posts on social media, and websites and online forums that track the standing of
countries
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in various
competitions
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. With
this
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premise,
therefore
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, it can be argued that the
Olympic
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Games
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still play a vital role in inspiring in
people
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a sense of pride and nationalism amid the waves of modernization that have swept many societies in
this
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generation.
In addition
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,
people
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still recognize the importance of the Olympics in fostering unity and harmony among
countries
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. Many
people
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still think that these
games
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are an excellent opportunity to put aside their differences and gather together in one international event. In fact, warring nations still make it a point to send their representatives to these
competitions
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and support their delegates by means of funding their athletes’ training and sports equipment. Host
countries
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, even allocate a significant amount of money for the construction of
such
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facilities as stadiums, open fields, gymnasiums, and covered courts to hold these
games
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.
This
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only goes to show that governments still see the role the Olympics play in uniting
countries
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and helping
individuals
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set aside their differences amid the mounting tensions contemporary societies these days are experiencing.
To conclude
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,
although
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there is a notion that certain
individuals
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do not anymore recognize the importance of the
Olympic
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Games
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in the 21st century, I completely disagree with
this
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view. From my perspective, governments and
individuals
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across the globe are starting to value these sporting events even more
along with
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the developments the world has seen in
this
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modern age.
Submitted by kkbor010 on

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task achievement
Use more specific examples to strengthen points, such as referencing a particular recent Olympics or specific events where patriotism was notably evident.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical flow by utilizing transition words more effectively between paragraphs or key points.
introduction
The introduction effectively outlines the writer's viewpoint and sets the stage for the essay.
logical structure
The essay maintains a clear and logical structure, effectively using paragraphs to separate different ideas and arguments.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the writer's stance, leaving a strong final impression.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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