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Band 7.5

Multicultural societies, where people of different ethnic groups live together can bring more benefits than drawbacks to a society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#societies #people #groups #society
Although
, there is no doubt that diverse ethnic colonies are emerging and it is important to determine the effects on the formation of society. I believe, it is beneficial because of the possibilities for becoming multilingual for future growth and to broaden the horizons.
First
 of all, the positive trait of living in a multi-cultured society is opportunities for learning more languages.
This
 is because interactions with multilingual people can help you to learn
further
 languages and acquaintance of various dialects can aid to gain international business or work prospects.
For example
, fluency of language like French and Spanish can open various doors for job opportunities in Europe. If,
instead
, people will stay concerned on one tongue, lack of knowledge could attract very less trade windows with other regions and
this
 could result into narrow business expansion and lower confidence of trading.
Furthermore
, multicultural neighbourhood can enrich comprehension of diverse cultures. Due to
this
, a person can help himself to increase a broad spectrum of thinking capabilities with learning and understanding depth of several traditions.
For instance
, reading literatures or learning about certain other dialect can teach him history, arts, foods and traditional festivals as well.
In contrast
, staying unfamiliar with
such
 exquisite knowledge can be a drawback and there would be no
such
 pleasure of enjoying different festivals and multicultural cuisines. In conclusion, because of the chances for learning other tongues and to feel the traditions of vast cultures, I believe
such
 positive influences from a multi-regional individuals can bring more prosperity in the community.
Submitted by brijennshah on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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