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Band 3.5

some people believe money is the best gift for the teenagers,while other do not support it.Discuss both the views and give your opinon.

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In today's modern world, where everything is changing, tackling with teenagers has become a
herculean
Suggestion
Herculean
 task.People are more concern about
Use synonyms
thier
of them or themselves
their
 children and they do take care about everything.Even the kind of gifts they
recieves
conforming to the established language usage of educated native speakers
received
 during some parties or other
occassions
something you have to do
occasions
.
some
Suggestion
Some
 people believe that
money
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 as a
gift
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 is a
best
Suggestion
good
 thing to give to the adolescence.
However
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, some are of opposite views.
This
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 essay delves the issue
,
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,
will examine both the sides and
then
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 come to the conclusion. On the one hand
,
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,
masses
Suggestion
the masses
 believe that
,
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,
cash is the best
gift
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 given to
the young
Suggestion
younger
 children as there are multifarious advantages of it.
First
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,
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,
it helps them to become more responsible and confident.As they will learn the
money
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 management skills and spend the
money
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 wisely.
Second
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,
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,
they can save
this
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money
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 in
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thier
of them or themselves
their
there
 piggy banks and use it later, which
further
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 develop the
money
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 saving skills in them.
Third
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,
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,
it makes younger people self-
sufficent
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sufficient, hence
sufficient hence
hence
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 they do not ask
money
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 from
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thier
of them or themselves
their
 parents
On the other hand
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, some individuals think that giving currency as a
gift
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 can spoil the child.As they can use
this
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money
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 in the wrong
ways
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ways, such
such
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 as smoking, alcoholism etc.They
further
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 argue that, exposure to
money
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this
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 age can divert them
o
in the direction of
to
or
 earn
money
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 rather than studies,
consequently
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,
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,
ruin
Suggestion
ruins
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thier
of them or themselves
their
 career
.
Accept space
.
 In compendium
,
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,
I
beleive
accept as true; take to be true
believe
 that,
although
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,
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,
there are various negatives of
this
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 trend.But
,
Accept space
,
gifting
money
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 as a
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gift can
Accept comma addition
gift, can
 make teenagers more efficient and ready to tackle
Use synonyms
thier
of them or themselves
their
 future.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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