In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, there have been a growing number of crimes in many developed countries.
Although
Linking Words
crimes take place due to various reasons, one noticeable factor is that people are not happy with their current lives.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss the reason in detail and suggest some solutions to deal with the issue. Most of all, one major reason of their dissatisfaction comes from unequal opportunities for wealth in our society.
In other words
Linking Words
, as our society becomes more and more industrialised and commercialised, the wealth gap between the rich and the poor is widening. If you are from
rich family
Suggestion
a rich family
, you can enjoy comfortable and abundant lives with enough money, whereas poor family will experience harder lives. So, if people realize that it will be difficult to avoid their poverty even though they strive to work hard,
then
Linking Words
they may easily fall into crimes to express their anger and
pains
Suggestion
pain
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some ways to solve
this
Linking Words
problem.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
government
Suggestion
the government
should try to distribute the wealth to everyone equally. Even though
this
Linking Words
is not
easy task
Suggestion
an easy task
to achieve, but the government should get rid of some regulations and rules that threaten poor people. Giving equal opportunity to every single person can prevent people from making
wrong decision
Suggestion
the wrong decision
wrong decisions
a wrong decision
. Equal employment and educational chances can make people happier in their daily lives.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the state should give people to receive equal chances for medical service and welfare pension so that they can maintain basic living condition. In Conclusion, unequal economic and welfare opportunity seems to be the main reason of increasing crimes. The government should work harder to create a peaceful
society which all
Suggestion
society in which all
people are treated fairly based on their effort and contribution.
Submitted by kyungjojung on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic disparity
  • propensity
  • recidivism
  • deterrent
  • rehabilitative
  • judicial system
  • corruption
  • socioeconomic
  • alienation
  • stigmatization
  • decriminalization
  • enforcement
  • gentrification
  • preemptive measures
  • intervention strategies
What to do next:
Look at other essays: