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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more schoolwork. How do you think children should spend their free time?

#people #children #time #schoolwork
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One point to consider that many of us as a
parents
Suggestion
parent
 or teacher we believe that children should
spent
Suggestion
spend
 their free
time
Use synonyms
 to do more schoolwork. We always concern about our
child
Use synonyms
’s studies. It is likely because after coming from
school
Use synonyms
 children spend most of their
time
Use synonyms
 to play or watch tv. Children are the age group can consider roughly 5 years to 10 years old.
This
Linking Words
 age group
do not concern
Suggestion
does not concern
 about their studies. After coming from
school
Use synonyms
 they either Play video games or watch tv.
if
Suggestion
If
 its not supervised by parents or caretakers,
child
Use synonyms
 influenced
with
Suggestion
by
 certain type of programmes or games which is harmful. Almost all of the above if
Use synonyms
child
Suggestion
the child
a child
 is not supervised, he/she might be influenced by his peers or friends with the wrong things. Nowadays schools
also
Linking Words
 carry lots of studies. Competition is so strong among with
Use synonyms
school
Suggestion
schools
the school
 and students that children must study. By having
school
Use synonyms
 worksheets, projects and homework a
child
Use synonyms
 needs to complete in order to stay
in
Suggestion
on
 track. Wasting
time
Use synonyms
 in games and watching television make loss of physical and mental development. Children are
the quick
Suggestion
quicker
 learners. They grasp things
quickly
Accept comma addition
quickly, hence
hence
Linking Words
 its always advisable that their free
time
Use synonyms
 should be productive in
positive way
Suggestion
a positive way
positive ways
. As I strongly believe that children free
time
Use synonyms
 should
spent
Suggestion
spend
 in extracurricular or in
school
Use synonyms
 activities which help them develop mentally and physically.
Linking Words
Secondly activities
Accept comma addition
Secondly, activities
 should be interesting which keep them engage and motivate. There are
variety
Suggestion
a variety
 of potential ways to keep
Use synonyms
child
Suggestion
children
a child
the child
 busy. Physical games like playing badminton, basketball, football keeps children fit and active. Chess, board games and puzzles are the good examples of mental development. Music class and dance help them to relax.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some of those games can be played by accompany
of
Suggestion
by
 parents. By that way Parents and
child
Use synonyms
 can enjoy creative
time
Use synonyms
 together. As a mother of two, Me and my elder
child
Use synonyms
 share same interest of doing art and craft and as well doing science experiments. When I look
this
Linking Words
, I feel that we both enjoys and learns new things out of that and share the strong bond in free
time
Use synonyms
of
Suggestion
with
 my
child
Use synonyms
. In
conclusion I
Accept comma addition
conclusion, I
 strongly believe that children
should spent
Suggestion
should spend
 their free
time
Use synonyms
 either doing recreational activities or schoolwork.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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