IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

With the development of online communication, people will never be alone and will always be able to make new friends. To what extent do you agree?

#development #communication #people #friends
People have been able to socialize and meet new people online daily due to the increase in interaction through
web
Suggestion
the web
. While few argue that it will keep the individuals occupied, I disagree
to
Suggestion
with
 the assertion that it will open paths to make new relations.
To begin
 with, there has been a tremendous increase in the way the internet and the means to communicate has paved its path with the growing technology. People have not only got the privilege to access the information online but, it has given them to connect to anyone in the world with just one click.
For example
, people can attend an interview or conduct business meetings across geographical locations from their home without even moving from their place and,
in
Suggestion
at
with
 no cost. Alternatively, due to the various readily available apps on the devices, people are able to find new friends and make relationships online which, in turn eliminates the loneliness among them.
Nevertheless
, with an increase in too much availability of
such
 apps, the identity of people is being compromised as it is being used in unlawful acts.
This
 would affect the people’s mindset as there is no human intervention and because of which the emotional connect is lost.
Moreover
, having too much of virtual connect could lead to illegal activities like cheating and extortion because of which the crime gradually increases.
Besides
, there are people who were able to make relationships online have no companions in their real life.
Subsequently
, it has lead them to get into depression and
loneliness though
Accept comma addition
loneliness, though
 they are surrounded by people all the time. In conclusion,
although
 the evolution of technology has relieved us from communicating with each other online, I disagree
to
Suggestion
with
 the assertion that it would never keep mankind away from each other.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • connectivity
  • geographical gaps
  • interact
  • social media platforms
  • messaging apps
  • revolutionized
  • physical distance
  • online communities
  • camaraderie
  • immediate surroundings
  • unparalleled opportunities
  • superficial relationships
  • excessive reliance
  • emotional warmth
  • tactile comfort
  • digital communication
  • digital divide
  • internet censorship
  • global connectivity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: