IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8.5

Some people believe that the development of information technology is more important for business success than good transport infrastructure. Others think that transport remains essential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

8.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
For most of history, a company's fortunes depended on its proximity to a port, a railway or a main road. Today, many argue that fast internet and modern software matter more than any physical route,
while
Linking Words
 others insist that roads and ports remain the backbone of commerce.
This
Linking Words
 essay will examine both positions before arguing that digital tools have transformed how firms operate, yet without reliable transport, most of that progress would never reach a customer.
First,
Linking Words
the ability of technology to eliminate distance will be explored, followed by an analysis of why physical infrastructure remains an absolute necessity.
Body paragraph 1
Those who prioritise technology rightly point to the way digital tools remove geographical barriers altogether.
For instance
Linking Words
, a designer in Fez can now sell to clients in Paris without ever leaving her studio, and a small shop can reach a national market through an inexpensive website. Closely linked to
this
Linking Words
 is the remarkable efficiency that software brings to daily operations; specifically, orders and stock levels that once filled paper cabinets are now managed in seconds.
Therefore
Linking Words
, digital systems allow a firm with ten employees to compete globally,
although
Linking Words
 these products must eventually be physically delivered.
Body paragraph 2
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, supporters of transport raise a decisive objection regarding the fulfilment of these digital promises.
For example
Linking Words
, a nation's tourism sector cannot thrive on online bookings alone if its airports and railways are crumbling.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, factories, hospitals and construction sites cannot move online, meaning their workers depend on buses and highways every single day.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 digital networks decide how quickly a business finds its customers, physical roads dictate whether it can ever serve them.
Conclusion
In summary, information technology has undoubtedly widened the reach of modern firms and streamlined their internal work.
However
Linking Words
, it cannot replace the physical infrastructure that carries goods and people; progress is meaningless if it cannot reach the consumer. Ultimately, a successful economy must invest heavily in both, ensuring that digital innovation is supported by a robust transport network.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your view is clear: both areas matter, but transport is still needed for goods and people. To make this even stronger, say more clearly in the first paragraph which one should get more money when a country must choose.
task response
The examples are useful and fit the main ideas. You could add one more case about a business that sells only online, such as software or music. This would show that your view also has room for cases where transport matters less.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is very easy to follow. Each main paragraph has one clear point, an example, and a link back to the question. Keep this strong order in future writing.
coherence and cohesion
Your linking words guide the reader well. Still, do not use too many signpost lines such as 'First' and 'followed by' in the first paragraph. A more direct start can sound more natural.
coherence and cohesion
The last paragraph sums up your ideas well. It could be even sharper if the first sentence of the last paragraph directly repeated your main choice: transport is the base that lets many digital gains work.
task response
You discuss both sides in a fair way and give a clear personal view throughout the essay.
task response
The points about online sales, stock control, tourism, factories, and workers are clear and closely linked to business success.
coherence and cohesion
The opening gives a clear map of the essay, and the ending brings the two sides together in a logical way.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as 'For instance', 'Nevertheless', 'Furthermore', and 'Consequently' make the links between ideas clear.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: