IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

some people think that goverment should spend on on railways while, others say that it is important to spending on public transport rather than railway lines. what do you extant

#people #goverment #railways #transport #railway #lines
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The enormous growth in the use of transportation vehicle over the
last
Linking Words
 decade has led to radical changes to the way that government should construct more. In many countries, some people claim that
government
Suggestion
the government
 should spend money on railways for trains in
cities while,
Suggestion
cities, while
 others say that it is essential to expand budget to expanding existing public
transport
Use synonyms
 rather than
railway
Use synonyms
 lines. In my opinion, I believe that having more
railway
Use synonyms
 for trains is necessary while enhancing public
transport
Use synonyms
 is more useful for consumers. On the one hand, many people are in favour of having the speedy and reliable train communication
system
Use synonyms
. Mainly fair on ground trains can carry
large number
Suggestion
a large number
 of passengers, it is good at
time
Suggestion
the time
times
 and
also
Linking Words
 train
system
Use synonyms
 can reduce traffic congestion.
Rail communication
Suggestion
The rail communication system
system
Use synonyms
 is faster, safer to connect to cities and town according to these people.
Therefore
Linking Words
, people often obtain that more and more sums of money should spend on distributing new
railway
Use synonyms
 lines as consequences,
railway
Use synonyms
transport
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 is famous in many countries.
For example
Linking Words
, train
system
Use synonyms
 in Japan
have amended
Suggestion
has amended
 group
Use synonyms
transport communication
Accept comma addition
transport, communication
 and it
has became
Suggestion
has become
 famous in passengers who adapt to it
realy
in accordance with truth or fact or reality
really
 well.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, it is true that people are keen on utilizing public
Use synonyms
transport which
Accept comma addition
transport, which
 is interconnected in
part
Suggestion
the part
parts
 of
city
Suggestion
the city
 and it is affordable for casual people according to these
indiviuals
a human being
individuals
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the highest percentage of people use public vehicles.
For instance
Linking Words
, Russia has terrible traffic jams in rush
hours
Accept comma addition
hours, however
however
Linking Words
, passengers arrive
in
Suggestion
at
 the place where they
want
change location; move, travel, or proceed, also metaphorically
went
 by public
transport
Use synonyms
 because it has respective routes for public vehicles
emergancy
a sudden unforeseen crisis (usually involving danger) that requires immediate action
emergency
 and policies. To conclude, in my personal perspective, that government should spend budget on distributing new railways rather than improving public
transport
Use synonyms
 currently.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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