IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many old cities around the world are going through a major process of modernization. What are the advantages and disadvantages of modernization?

#cities #world #process #modernization
We are living in a modern
world
, to keep pace with the modern
world
 different old urban areas around the globe is changing through the different
process
 of
modernization
. The major
advantage
 of
this
this
modernization
process
 is that it makes our life more convenient,
however
, it has some negative
effect
 on our natural
environment
. The main
advantage
 of the
modernization
 is that it improves our infrastructure, education system and communication sector, which improves our way of living.
Firstly
, the buildings
of
Suggestion
in
 residential areas are improved,
as a
result these
Accept comma addition
result, these
 buildings are now more robust to the natural calamities and keep us
more safe
Suggestion
safer
.
Secondly
, the improvement of our education system is caused by the introduction of modern technology, so that students could learn different subjects more conveniently. The
advantage
 of
modernization
 has outstanding
effect
 on communication sector. Now, we can travel anywhere within a short time by using our modern vehicles. These are the few
advantage
Suggestion
advantages
 that upgrades our lifestyle.
On the other hand
, the
process
 of
modernization
 has tremendous
effect
 on our natural
environment
. The residential areas are built by cutting down the trees. As we know that trees play a vital role
on
Suggestion
in
 our
living
Suggestion
lives
, so cutting down the trees
pollute
Suggestion
pollutes
 our
environment
.
Besides
this
, increasing number of vehicles in cities emits carbon-dioxide and other greenhouse gases in the
environment
. For
this
 reason, the
world
’s temperature is increasing day by day, which causes global warming. Due to the global warming, natural disasters are
also
 increasing every year. To sum up, we could not stop the
modernization
 of
this
world
, it’s an ongoing
process
. To live in
this
world
 we have to face both positive and negative
effect
Suggestion
effects
 of the
modernization
.
Submitted by eshwar10882 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: