Parents of obese children should be punished for making their children fat. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued by some people that making
children
fat by Use synonyms
parents
is a punishable act. Use synonyms
This
essay disagrees with the statement because guardians do not have time to cook Linking Words
food
and genetic factors are Use synonyms
also
concerned. Linking Words
Firstly
, Linking Words
parents
have less time nowadays to make delicious Use synonyms
food
at home for their offspring. In Use synonyms
this
era, to earn bread and butter, both mother and father must have to work because rates of various things are increasing dramatically. Linking Words
Therefore
, Linking Words
children
have to rely on other eatables. So, they consume Use synonyms
food
from Use synonyms
school’s
canteens or fast Change noun form
school
food
outlets like Use synonyms
Macdonalds
, Subway and so on. Correct your spelling
McDonald's
For example
, a recent survey by ‘Times’ found that 65% of Linking Words
school
Correct your spelling
schoolchildren
children
consume junk Use synonyms
food
from different sources. So, nothing can be done Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
about
this
issue and Linking Words
parents
should not be punished. Use synonyms
On the other hand
, genetic factors are Linking Words
also
a significant reason why Linking Words
children
are obese. Some cells are generally inherited from Use synonyms
parents
. Use synonyms
Such
Linking Words
child
with these cells will have Correct article usage
a child
slow
metabolism compared to a child with Correct article usage
a slow
faster
metabolism. Because of that, even though, Add an article
a faster
such
Linking Words
child, consuming
healthy Wrong verb form
children consume
food
and Use synonyms
doing
regular exercise, maybe fat. Wrong verb form
do
For example
, a recent study by MIT stated that obesity and genes areLinking Words
inter-related
. Because of that, mothers and fathers should not be considered guilty for their Correct your spelling
interrelated
children
’s obesity. In conclusion, obesity can occur in sons and daughters because Use synonyms
parents
do not have time to cook at home and Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
due to
genetic factors. So, mothers and fathers should not be penalized because these reasons are natural and nothing can be done for Linking Words
this
issue.Linking Words
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion