At the present time, the population of some countries include a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

As the population is increasing on daily basis, the ratio of young people to old people is

also

effecting. Some countries are facing serious troubles in

this

matter as there are few younger people than older people and vice versa. Though some people might think that

this

is better

situation

Suggestion

situated

. But in my

opinion having

Accept comma addition

opinion, having

more younger

Suggestion

younger

crowd

then

the older in your country might have a

good

Suggestion

better

impact globally. In

this

essay we will talk about how having

more younger

Suggestion

younger

crowd is better than having older crowd. As we know that young

generation

is filled with

energy always

Accept comma addition

energy, always

trying to be as quick as possible.

This

makes them more efficient towards their

work

and they

also

might take less time to do

work

Suggestion

the work

For

example in

Accept comma addition

example, in

India if you ever go to a government bank, you will see a long queue of customers and in front of them is some 60 years old man/women doing the

work

patiently. While if you go to a private bank you will see

work

getting done

Suggestion

with

much faster speed because these banks generally hire young people for better

work

productivity. Another advantage I can think of is that since

younger

Suggestion

the younger generation

generation

is more energetic they always want to be their own boss. Doing something for their self. Because they are in the prime of their life and at

this

point they can take risks. If they build their own venture they will be helping in the Gross domestic product of their country. Which again if you are old you can’t afford to do because you have much more

responsibilities

Suggestion

responsibility

at that time. The only disadvantage I can think of is younger

generation

are lacking in experience of the real world. And the older

generation

are the only people who can help them in that sector. In conclusion, I know that having a large young population in a country is always beneficial

then

having a larger older

generation

. As the young

generation

Submitted by sankalprajsrivastava on Wed Dec 04 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

329 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries include a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some governments provide financial assistance for retired, unemployed and disabled citizens. In other countries, families provide support for these people. Discuss both systems and give your opinion about which one you think is better.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?