IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Modern technology is changing our world. This has advantages such as bringing people closer together through communication. It also has disadvantages such as destroying the differences between cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#technology #world #people #communication #differences #cultures
Over the past few decades,
technology
 has comprehensively occupied our lives, and have made it effortless rather convenient. Some people view
technology
 as a blessing, since it is highly responsible for keeping thousands of people connected. While, others believe that it has adversely affected customs and values. I think the benefits of
technology
 are more superior than its drawback. Undoubtedly, now there is hardly any field which is not
technology
-driven, be it cooking, cleaning, communication or many more. In the past, it was extremely difficult for workplaces
to deliver
Suggestion
deliver
 their message to other overseas companies. But, now
this
 process can take place in a blink of an eye with the help of an e-mail or fax.
Furthermore
, social networking websites
has shortened
Suggestion
have shortened
 the distance and have provided and an incredibly easy and economical way for its users’ to communicate with their loved ones via phone calls or video messages.
For example
, it was recently published in a local newspaper that it takes nanoseconds for an electronic-mail to be delivered from one computer to another.
However
, the ubiquity of
technology
 has made it difficult for people to pursue their cultural values which is viewed by some as a major drawback. Social media plays a vital role to influence one’s mind, people now instantly follow trends related to clothing, lifestyle, makeup and many more.
In addition
, they fail to understand how
such
 acts could drift them away from their cultural values and can lose identity.
For instance
, an American survey was conducted and it was found that due to the frequent use of media sites, languages can be intermixed and vocabulary can be changed, which poses risk to several languages. To sum up,
technology
 serves humankind in the best possible and it’s advantages outweighs the disadvantages.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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