"Many animal species in the world has become extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protects these animals from dying out, while others say that we should concentrate more on problems of human being. Discuss both view and give your opinion"

#species #world #people #countries #individuals #animals

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It is true that a plethora of wild

animals

Use synonyms

are on the verge of extinction

due to

Linking Words

human’s insatiable need for economic property. In light of

this

Linking Words

, animal conservation has long been a popular topic of interest.

However

Linking Words

, some argue that preserving endangered species is unnecessary and these funds should be diverted to projects that directly benefit humankind.

While

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

thinking is partially justifiable, I believe that it is in the interests of humankind to devote more effort to saving wild

animals

Use synonyms

There are several reasons why many people are convinced that there should be more contributions to human welfare. Advocates can argue that there are more urgent and pressing issues today that must be addressed than protecting

wildlife

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, nations where unemployment, poverty, and famine are rife and in severe need of assistance to alleviate

such

Linking Words

problems and raise living standards. In comparison with these urgent problems, protecting the extinction of some

animals

Use synonyms

seems like an unworthy cause Despite the aforementioned justifications, I still believe that it is imprudent to ignore the importance of combatting the demise of some

animals

Use synonyms

That is

Linking Words

to say, humans have an inseparable relationship with

wildlife

Use synonyms

, which means that the extinction of wild

animals

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could take a heavy toll on the survival of humankind. America is a typical example, where more than a quarter of prescriptions contain substances found in

animals

Use synonyms

and plants.

Therefore

Linking Words

, preserving wild

animals

Use synonyms

is crucial because if they are vulnerable, their medical benefits will

also

Linking Words

disappear.

This

Linking Words

is a testament to how spending on the preservation of

wildlife

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is synonymous with safeguarding the existence of humans

Although

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it seems that protecting human interests should be taken into precedence, I still believe that protecting

wildlife

Use synonyms

is no less important

Submitted by quynhtranhbh on Fri Jan 12 2024

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task achievement

It is imperative that you provide more specific examples to support your viewpoints. The essay tends to be abstractive without solid evidence to substantiate the claims.

coherence cohesion

The essay must be organized in a more logical manner. Ideas should flow from one to the next in a clear sequence, and paragraphs must be well-connected with appropriate use of linking phrases.

task achievement

Develop your argumentation further. Each paragraph should contain a clear main idea and be expanded with detailed explanation and illustration.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are aligned and that both reflect a clear stance on the issue, thus enhancing the essay's coherence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

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"Many animal species in the world has become extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protects these animals from dying out, while others say that we should concentrate more on problems of human being. Discuss both view and give your opinion"

Include an introduction and conclusion

The internet has revolutionized communication and access to information. However, some argue that its negative impacts such as isolation and the spread of misinformation, outweigh its benefits. Discuss both sides of this argument and give your own opinion.

Should education and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services?

Ambition is a positive quality for people to have in society today. How important is it for people who want to succeed in life? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?

In many cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbours and there is a lack of sense of community. What are the causes of this problem? How can it be solved?

In some countries, people encourage their children to get a job or to travel after this and education what are the advantageous and disadvantage?