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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people believe that the death penalty can reduce crimes. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #death #penalty #crimes
Capital punishment is often at the top of the agenda throughout the
world whether
Accept comma addition
world, whether
 it aids in restricting
crime rate
Suggestion
the crime rate
 or not. I completely agree with
this
 notion not only because it saves a nation from re-offenders and terminate their
network
 with others, but
also
 gives a lesson to others.
This
 essay will explore how these factors justify the
death
 sentence as a way to control
crime
.
Firstly
, many convicts
commit
Suggestion
commits
 crimes after completing their sentences. Because of the lack of effective rehabilitation system in many nations, offenders are unable to secure a better place in the society, and often get back to their criminal world. Take an example of Yemen, where Abu Ramal, a Yemen rebel, was exonerated by the government, and he was the sole real for igniting a civil war.
Thus
, hanging to
death
 is one a measure to control
offenses
a lack of politeness; a failure to show regard for others; wounding the feelings or others
offences
.
Secondly
, dangerous criminals have a strong
network
 with their gangs behind the bars. As some corrupt officials allow incarcerated criminals to operate their
network
 from jail by giving access to electronic gadgets.
This
 fact can be better explained with an example of a peace process in Afghanistan, where the country head of Al-Qaida was involved in orchestrating many terrorist activities in Kabul from jail.
Hence
,
death punishment
Accept comma addition
death, punishment
 breaks the connection with other members and put
bar
Suggestion
bars
 on
further
 criminal activities.
Finally
, in order to curb the
crime
 rate,
death punishment
Accept comma addition
death, punishment
 can be used as a tool to give a lesson to other convicts and the general public to refrain themselves from
such
 kind of activity and abide by the law.
Therefore
, the fear of
death
 in public is a must to control
crime
. To sum up, the
death
 penalty is fully justified in decreasing the
crime
 rate in terms of giving a moral lesson to the public, stop re-
conviction
Suggestion
convicted
 and breaking the criminal
network
.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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