Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
A major part of kids are very addicted to their smartphones and dedicate most of their
time
to these technological Use synonyms
devices
. Use synonyms
Although
some people allow their Linking Words
children
to spend most of their Use synonyms
time
on phones in order to keep them busy which may help parents to focus on the things which are more important Use synonyms
such
as chores, in my opinion, Linking Words
this
process has a negative impact on Linking Words
children
's well-being.
Use synonyms
Firstly
, the issues that mobile phones or laptops can create on health are enormous and contain long-term effects. The blue light Linking Words
that is
emitted from electronic Linking Words
devices
' screens causes poor sight especially when individuals are exposed Use synonyms
the
light at an early age. There are different studies that Change preposition
to the
proved
that blue light Wrong verb form
prove
damage
the outer layer of the eyes and Correct subject-verb agreement
damages
it
causes dried, red eyes which leads to chronic diseases Correct pronoun usage
apply
such
as astigmatism. Linking Words
Additionally
, the long hours spent on phones may provoke problems Linking Words
such
as depression or anger issues. The main reason for these issues is video games because they can be very annoying for Linking Words
children
especially when they lose a game round.
Use synonyms
Secondly
, the content that Linking Words
children
can reach using their smartphones should be restricted based on their ages. Because, these contents may contain some kind of violence, nudity, or something else Use synonyms
that is
not suitable for them. Linking Words
Moreover
, smartphones steal a large amount of Linking Words
time
from kids. These individuals should spend Use synonyms
time
on their creativity to build different skills Use synonyms
such
as painting, music, or science.
In conclusion, Linking Words
while
parents let their Linking Words
children
spend a lot of Use synonyms
time
on smart Use synonyms
devices
for their own good, they Use synonyms
also
should acquire its negative consequences. The kids should be avoided from these Linking Words
devices
by their parents and encouraged to build different skill sets.Use synonyms
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task achievement
Ensure the use of more specific examples and data to strengthen the argument about the long-term effects of smartphones on children's health. This will enhance the task achievement and illustrate points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow by clearly distinguishing between the reasons for the issue and its impacts. Signposting can help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
task achievement
The essay provides a well-rounded argument by examining both the reasons for children's increased smartphone usage and the negative impacts it may have.
coherence cohesion
You successfully integrate an introduction and conclusion that neatly frame the essay and reinforce your stance on the issue.
coherence cohesion
The essay explores multiple reasons and impacts, demonstrating clear idea generation and coverage of the topic.