one of the consequences of the medical care is that people are living longer and expentensy is increasing Do you think this advantage of development overwieghts the disadvantage?

#consequences #care #people #expentensy #advantage #development #overwieghts

It is often said that,

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

everything you see

Correct subject-verb agreement

exists

show examples

exist

Correct subject-verb agreement

exists

show examples

together in a delegate balance. Modern medical facilities and research in the healthcare sector have brought miracles to the world. The main significance of advancements in technology, with respect to health,

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

created a positive improvement across the world

that

Change preposition

in that

show examples

people get

medicate

Wrong verb form

medicated

show examples

and recover earlier when they suffer from any ailment which results

Change preposition

in to

show examples

increase the

life

expectancy. In

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

we will discuss, the pros of

this

growth which

outweighs

Correct subject-verb agreement

outweigh

show examples

the cons. From my point of view, as time flies there are several scientific breakthroughs in the field of

medical

Replace the word

medicine

show examples

which are widespread and they enhance on

day-to-day

Add an article

a day-to-day

show examples

basis, resulting

into

Change preposition

show examples

the rise of lifespan.

This

strategy is disturbing the death/birth rate ratio, but

on the other

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

it is increasing the chances to live a longer

life

From

Change preposition

Over

show examples

the

last

two decades, there

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

been an abrupt change in the advancements of medicines field.

For instance

, we use vitamin supplements to balance our

body

Change noun form

body's

show examples

nutrient levels, even though we

also

have the technology of high-profile machinery and

equipment’s

Change noun form

equipment

show examples

to perform any unembellished surgery which

also

safes

Correct your spelling

saves

show examples

the

life

of patients. From my perspective,

this

development in the medical sector

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

serious consequences in the world, as natural

life

anticipation is increasing which

results

Add the preposition

results in

results from

show examples

a picture

for

Change preposition

show examples

the shortage of basic needs for people like food, shelter and clothes. To illustrate,

according to

the

last

surveys, the population is increasing on

Correct article usage

show examples

daily basis and for controlling the circle of

life

appropriate policies should

be enforce

Change the verb form

be enforced

show examples

by the state to implement them.

To conclude

, thanks to the enhanced medical facilities

due to

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

we now live longer and

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

part of the progress.

This

enhanced

life

expectancy is a blessing for the human race

Wed Dec 25 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

life expectancy
public health
medical technology
vaccinations
antibiotics
senior health care
geriatric services
overpopulation
natural resources
environmental strain
dependency ratio
working-age population
retirees
contribute to society
personal goals
medical industry
economic growth
age-related diseases
health care costs
health care system

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people think that people who choose a job early and keep doing it are more likely to get a satisfying career life than those who frequently change jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today’s modern era, some people think that if workers get a job early and stick with it throughout their careers, they will be more successful than others changing jobs frequently. This writer agrees with this statement and will explain during the essay.
5.5
band
Some people think that it is a good idea to socialize with colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it is important to keep job separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Some believe that spending time with your co-workers after work is beneficial to us, while others suggest that it is essential to maintain social distancing with your colleagues. In this essay, I will elaborate on both sides of the view, and I partially agree on the necessity of having good relationships with colleagues.
8
band
People can eat a wide variety of food that can be grown in other areas. As a result, people eat more food produced in other regions than that only locally made. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In today’s globalized world, people have the opportunity to consume food from different parts of the globe. This trend has both advantages and disadvantages. After analyzing both sides of the argument, I believe that the benefits surpass the drawbacks.
6
band
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Urbanization has been a debatable topic in the world because it has been impacting the numbers of population in rural areas. The advantages of shifting population in the city are better job opportunities and facilities than in rural areas. However, the decreasing number of people that live in urban areas would bring some burden such as the strain on urban infrastructure. I wholeheartedly argue that urbanization brings more negative effects.
7.5
band
Some people get into debt by buying things they do not need and are unable to afford. What are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?
We humans have always had a penchant for purchasing items that we often do not use effectively. Thereby, some people accumulate a significant amount of debt without any signs of paying it back. It is my contention that although there are certain characteristical properties that might lead to this position, numerous alleviating techniques are also available to cope with this unwanted behaviour among many individuals.

one of the consequences of the medical care is that people are living longer and expentensy is increasing Do you think this advantage of development overwieghts the disadvantage?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that people who choose a job early and keep doing it are more likely to get a satisfying career life than those who frequently change jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that it is a good idea to socialize with colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it is important to keep job separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

People can eat a wide variety of food that can be grown in other areas. As a result, people eat more food produced in other regions than that only locally made. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people get into debt by buying things they do not need and are unable to afford. What are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?