Some people say that art is an essential subject and everyone should learn it in school. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #art #school

It has been believed that

art

create

Suggestion

creates

an indispensable benefit to people, so it should be made the mandatory subject in an academic pursuit.

This

essay

completely disagree

Suggestion

completely disagrees

with the statement as professions beside arts are fostering nowadays.

To begin

with, learning institutions

constists

Suggestion

consist

consists

of different categories of subjects including arts. Every student might not have

fond

come upon unexpectedly or after searching

found

and interest

Suggestion

those sectors as some of them can focus to learn other theoretical subjects.

Moreover

, education should not be restricted on a particular subject because people perceive that others areas have more scope in

comparision

the act of examining resemblances

comparison

to the arts.

For instance

, myriad of students are

engaging

Suggestion

engaged

in fields like engineering, teaching and nursing rather than in an

art

owing to benefits of them.

Secondly

, nowadays, people found it less fascinating to visit

art gallery

Suggestion

an art gallery

art galleries

, museum as compare to previous days because of limited time and interest.

In addition

this

, listening music, drawing are merely taken as spare time activities and people

choosed

pick out, select, or choose from a number of alternatives

chose

choose

their carrier on

other

any of various alternatives; some other

another

profession

Suggestion

profession such as

such

as in business enterprises, hospitals.

For example

, other highly recognized professionals

such

as medical fields have been valued and

choosen

one who is the object of choice; who is given preference

chosen

choosing

despite of

Suggestion

art

. Admittedly

Accept space

the artists

also

can be taken as a

jewellery

Suggestion

jewel

nation

Suggestion

the nation

a nation

and they are hired by governments, military agency and crime investigation department.

Thus

, it is

also

necessary to have artists in the country. In conclusion, notwithstanding the above paragraph,

refers to the speaker or writer

would stick to my view that

art

shouldnot

Suggestion

should not

made

Suggestion

make

compolsary

required by rule

compulsory

subects

the subject matter of a conversation or discussion

subjects

, whilst learners should have

authority

Suggestion

the authority

to achieve education on the subject of their choice.

Submitted by bt6683736 on Sun Dec 29 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

257 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that art is an essential subject and everyone should learn it in school. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

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Some people think that a sense of competition in children shoul be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adultsz. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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