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Writing Samples
Band 5

These days, a great number of children prefer spending time on computer games rather than on sports. Why Is it a positive or negative development?

#children #time #computer #games #sports #development
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It is true that a lot of children play
video
Use synonyms
 games for hours on end and ignore physical activities. While some argue that playing
computer
Use synonyms
 games can benefit children in some ways, in my opinion, there are a few reasons why
this
Linking Words
 trend does more harm than good to children development. As regards why children spend more time on
computer
Use synonyms
 games than other sport activities, I would argue that the main reason is the unprecedented affordability and ubiquity of
computer
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 devices. The advance in the graphical quality and gameplay of
video
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 games is
results
Suggestion
resulting
 in the increasing amount of time spent on playing these games
in
Suggestion
with
 kids.
Video
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 games, especially mobile games
on
Suggestion
for
 smartphones, has more children-friendly content,
such
Linking Words
 as animated cartoon characters, funny songs, engaging activities like feeding animals. For kids, those contents are more attractive than traditional sports like football or badminton.
In addition
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,
computer
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 games do not need too much training and are easy to start compared with other traditional outdoor activities which often requires basic skills and necessary items. While playing
video
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 games at a young age is becoming popular, I believe it is detrimental to children.
Video
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 games are fun to play for children, but they do not boost the physical interaction for children. Physical activities at the young age is important to develop their strength and agility.
Moreover
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, studies show that light from
Use synonyms
computer screen
Suggestion
a computer screen
computer screens
the computer screen
 is harmful for children’s eyesight.
Besides
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 physical development,
video
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 games
also
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 affect the cognitive development. Games including violent content might make children more aggressive and become isolated. These types of
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
 could be symptoms of serious mental health problems later in life. While
video
Use synonyms
 games could be beneficial for children, I do not believe it should replace sports as a main way of entertainment for kids. Parents should encourage their kids to participate in outdoor activities and limit their amount of time spent playing
video
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 games.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • captivate
  • supervise
  • accessible
  • scarcity
  • safer alternative
  • peer pressure
  • educational tools
  • cognitive skills
  • implications
  • obesity
  • poor posture
  • hand-eye coordination
  • problem-solving abilities
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