Nowadays, people of all ages from certain parts of the world spend most time at home rather than going outdoors. Discuss the reasons, is this negative or positive development.

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In
this
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tech-driven world, most of the people prefer to stay at home and show reluctance to go out and spend time. There is a plethora of reasons for
this
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trend including
Accept comma addition
trend, including
the influence of social and mass media. In
this
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essay I intend to discuss some of the reasons for
this
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trend, and reach a conclusion that
such
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changes have got
detrimental effect
Suggestion
a detrimental effect
on the individual, with substantial evidences.
Eventough
Suggestion
Even tough
, there
is
Suggestion
are
surplus causes that make people to remain
indoor
within a building
indoors
, the
first
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and
prodominant
most frequent or common
predominant
reason for
this
Linking Words
tendency is the advancement in social media. To be clearer, nowadays it is easy and convenient to create and maintain relationships online through various applications available. Whereas in olden days people used to have
face
Suggestion
a face
to face conversation by meeting outdoors.
Moreover
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, different organizations provide opportunities for their employees to work from home, using the channels of telecommunications.
For instance
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, individuals highly rely on social media
such
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as WhatsApp, Facebook and Twitter for both formal and informal communication.
On the other hand
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, the caged-life have
deleterious effect
Suggestion
a deleterious effect
deleterious effects
on persons, especially it affects the psychology. To be precise,
man
Suggestion
a man
is a gregarious animal and living alone in the four walls will
leads
Suggestion
lead
him to fall
in to
expresses motion to a point on, or within, something
into
depression and other psychological conditions.
Furthermore
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, for the physical and psychological well-being, each human needs
explosure
vulnerability to the elements; to the action of heat or cold or wind or rain
exposure
to the outer world which boost their energy and immune system. To cite an example, an article published in one of the famous journals reveals that many people are suffering from depression
as a result
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of their isolated life. To recapitulate, various reasons like improvement of social media stapled man to indoors, which in turn resulted in many psychological I'll effects like depression and isolation.
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Thus according
Accept comma addition
Thus, according
to my perspective, people's tendency to live in
small environment
Suggestion
the small environment
of their possessions is a negative development.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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