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Band 7

Some people say that the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

#people #life #money
It is considered by some that
money
 can become a key factor in determining
happiness
. In some cases,
this
 statement can be true.
However
, there are many other aspects that can have a great influence on people’s
happiness
. On the one hand, being rich can make people feel happier.
In particular
,
money
 can improve people living standard,
thus
 increasing their
happiness
.
For example
, wealth helps them to afford better houses, cars and clothes,
hence
 improving their life quality.
Moreover
,
money
 can buy stress relief.
For instance
, financial security can help people to eliminate stress from home loan, household bills and rent payment. Another illustration could be that being rich allows people to hire assistants or housemaids, who can help them to reduce workloads and have more
time
 to relax and take care of themselves. On the other hands,
money
 cannot buy
happiness
.
Firstly
,
money
 cannot buy
health
. If you are rich, it means you need to work more than others and you might suffer from some
health
 problems
such
 as high blood pressure or cardiovascular disease. In
this
 case, no matter how rich you are, you cannot take your good
health
 back.
Secondly
,
money
 cannot buy
your
second person pronoun; the person addressed
you
time
. To be specific, wealthy individuals tend to spend more
time
 at work as they always want to earn more.
As a result
, they do not have enough
time
 for their family and doing what they actually love.
Last
 but not least, the rich people can get their gratification instantly, which can result in instant unhappiness. In fact, as affluent people can quickly buy expensive goods, which makes them feel no longer excited anymore.
In other words
, the instant gratification makes them feel empty and less motivated to work. In conclusion,
although
money
 can offer you a better living standard and comfort life, having a lot of
money
 does not guarantee that you can have a high level of
happiness
,
health
 and freedom.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Basic needs
  • Comfort
  • Luxury
  • Freedom
  • Altruistic
  • Philanthropy
  • Nurturing relationships
  • Fulfillment
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Physical well-being
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Community involvement
  • Gratitude
  • Mindfulness
  • Simple pleasures
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