In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out f doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Few range of America districts decided to bend that people who are under 18 years old are not able to outdoor activities after 10pm. They have to be with parents or other guardian if it is necessary. I believe
that is
Linking Words
a great idea to preserve children from the dangerous situation.
This
Linking Words
circumstance has been a kind of trends in the world recently. Some Asian countries like Japan and Korea made a law about entertainers who are still students. They should avoid to broadcast at late night. It is the same reason with curfew, which is for their safety for younger age. The major reason why I agree with
this
Linking Words
rule is significant crimes often occurred at night time. Especially serious problems present at urban street with drunken, homeless and people who drug. Sometimes even adults feel scared during walking in the central of cities in the midnight.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I strongly insist that parents should be together with their children outside in the late time. While, I believe that the limitation reflects how the city is safe for children.
For example
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
New York is always crowed by
diversity
Suggestion
diverse
people, but it is quite safety. Because police
officer
Suggestion
officers
keep
Suggestion
keeps
walking and driving around to check if there are
strengers
anyone who does not belong in the environment in which they are found
strangers
.
Few months
Suggestion
A few months
ago, a little girl who is just 12 years ago went out to meet a
boyfriends
Suggestion
boyfriend
at 9pm. She met someone on the way and she disappeared in a sudden. Her parents checked all CCTY of
street
Suggestion
the street
where she has passed.
but
Suggestion
But
unfortunately they
are no longer meet
Suggestion
no longer meet
are no longer meeting
have no longer met
her again. It looks like a horrible drama story, but it
happend
come to pass
happened
in
real situation
Suggestion
real situations
.
Although
Linking Words
unbelievable accident could be
accured
come to pass
occurred
acquired
accrued
anytime, high percentages of crimes which involved children are
cuased
put or send forth
cast
cased
in the dark. In conclusion, young ages are the one of weakness in the society who need protection and care by adults. I ensure that old generation should have responsibilities for
Linking Words
next generation
Suggestion
the next generation
to grow up without danger and
unsafty
Suggestion
. For
this
Linking Words
, we need
more specific law
Suggestion
a more specific law
more specific laws
to support people under 18 years old who
are trapped
Suggestion
is trapped
easily by
dangerous situataion
Suggestion
a dangerous situation
dangerous situation
dangerous situations
dangerous station
.
Submitted by piaosola on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: