Young people are not as healthy as fifty years ago. To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

There is no doubt that a healthy lifestyle plays an important role for everybody. Personally, I agree with the opinion, that teens and young adults are less healthy nowadays, than their ancestors were fifty years ago. In fact, I feel
this
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way for two reasons that I will explore in the following essay.
Firstly
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, the technological development is the
first
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thing to blame. One should note here, that several decades ago people did many various types of activities,
such
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as outdoor games or walking around a city.
However
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, in our modern world citizens are more likely to spend their free time playing computer games or watching
Youtube
Suggestion
YouTube
on a smartphone.
In addition
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to
this
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, many students spend plenty of time in studies and learning additional information for their careers.
Consequently
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, people have a sedentary lifestyle which greatly affects their health and leads to serious physical and mental diseases.
Secodly
Suggestion
Secondly
, in my country the government provides less incentives for residents to do sports activities.
For example
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, nearly forty years
ago there
Accept comma addition
ago, there
were many different public facilities to do swimming, running and jogging, but now it is up to individuals to build and organise.
As a result
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, students at schools and universities don’t have any good equipment as well as comfortable places
such
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as gyms, because all new and modern places require additional payment for visiting. What is more, public marathons throughout a city are quite unpopular, so less and less participants join these events. To draw the conclusion, because of the reasons above, I think that young inhabitants are
less healthier
Suggestion
less healthy
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then
conjunction used in comparatives
than
before.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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