IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In the past, there were strict guidelines about how people should dress for work, but in recent times dress codes seem to have been relaxed. Is this a positive or negative development?

In my opinion, the relaxation of the dress code at work is a worrying development.
Although
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 it goes without saying that employers should prioritise the quality of their staff’s performance, I think that dressing smartly at work is essential
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I will outline my reasons below. The main reason why employers need to pay more attention to the way their staff dress is
because
Change preposition
that
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 casual clothes give a very bad first impression of the company,
whereas
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 formal clothes convey an image of respectability and trustworthiness, two qualities which are important in so many professions that involve face-to-face interaction with members of the public. One illustration of
this
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 is in the banking sector. It is the responsibility of a manager to ensure that customers feel confident that their money is in safe hands. A smart suit suggests that if the staff care about their appearance,
then
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 they will take care of your investment
too
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, too
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.
On the other hand
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, just because someone dresses well, it does not necessarily guarantee that they are good at their job, and vice versa. In my workplace,
for example
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, the best teachers are often the ones
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 care more about how to teach well than how to dress well, and their students never seem to notice what they are wearing. There are
also
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 many creative professions where trendy clothes convey a sense of style and individuality, which is very desirable in many companies.
To conclude
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, an employee’s ability to perform well in their job has to be the highest priority in any profession.
However
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, the need to wear
uniform
Correct article usage
a uniform
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 smartly and appropriately should
also
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 be an important consideration in many workplaces. Personally, if I
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 paying large amounts of money to a teacher in flip-flops who looked as if they had just got up, I would have serious concerns about that person’s attitude towards their work and their ability to teach me effectively.

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structure
Make your main idea clearer in each paragraph by putting a topic sentence at the start.
content
Add more specific reasons tied to dress codes and how they affect work, such as safety, company image, and staff morale.
style
Use simpler sentences and shorter phrases to keep easy flow.
grammar
Check grammar and word choice in sentences like 'if I was' and 'care about'.
stance
Clear position against relaxed dress code.
examples
Good use of examples from banking, teaching, and creative work.
organization
Good structure with intro, body, and conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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