Nowadays, celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievement and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievement #sets #people

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It is seemed that most of the artists are being popular for their attraction and riches while it should be seen through their accomplishment, for giving a good figure to the adolescent. I partially agree with

this

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statement which I will explain in

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following paragraph. On the one hand, in

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contemporary world, there are various sophisticated things

such

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as gadget which could affect the immature persons through its widespread information of entertainment.

This

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will reflect unpleasant sample for them, since, some news is usually informing unsuitable matter for their age.

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, they know that how to be a famous is only by performing their charming and wealth

that is

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truly wrong idea. As an entertainer, many aspects that should be considered properly to perform their talent,

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, receiving a reward annually for their best acting could motivate younger to effort their future.

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, they

also

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could be having a right attitude by giving a donation to either reform or charitable institution.

On the other hand

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although

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they have a great emission, it is better to spend it for the philanthropy

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of private necessity.

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conversely

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, some artists are likely to show their wealth through their glamour and branded accessories, items and accomodation in some cases.

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this

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will lead to the controversial issues among society and impact to the discrepancy social. The probability is that their figure is on the top which will be easily affecting most people especially to the teenagers. Whereas, they should have a proper mind as well as best public figure to build a great concept for their

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steps to reach their dream.

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can not be assured that the celebrities could give a good example for them. By way of conclusion, it is true that showing a good behaviour is pivotal things for the youthful to be a good individual. From my viewpoint, it is most agreeable to the entertainment company for leading the artists to be more polite and altruistically in front of the public due to the uncontrollable emotional of younger.

Submitted by ishmameliaz29 on Tue Jan 14 2020

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14
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

345 words

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Nowadays, celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievement and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

One of the consequence of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local language. If these are not taught many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?