IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people say that international sporting events contribute greatly to peace and stability in the world.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

2.0 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
Sport is the best way to spread love and peace
.
Accept space
.
 Take an example of
football world cup organization
Suggestion
a football world cup organization
,
Accept space
,
 the
last
Linking Words
 event was held in
russia
a former communist country in eastern Europe and northern Asia; established in 1922; included Russia and 14 other soviet socialist republics (Ukraine and Byelorussia and others); officially dissolved 31 December 1991
Russia
 and you can see more than 50 nationality is celebrating and encouraging
thier
of them or themselves
their
 teams without any reported incident that there was any issues or troubles
.
Accept space
.
Body paragraph 1
Massive
cermonies
a formal event performed on a special occasion
ceremonies
sermons
ceremonials
such
Linking Words
 as
olympic
of or relating to the Olympic Games
Olympic
 games or
worldcup
Suggestion
 or any sort of the big events
,
Accept space
,
alawys
at all times; all the time and on every occasion
always
 consider cultural
divesity
noticeable heterogeneity
diversity
 and positive environment by spreading ads all over the surrounding areas or even in the game field
.
Accept space
.
Body paragraph 2
Good athletes are
alawys
at all times; all the time and on every occasion
always
 giving a positive
vibes
Suggestion
vibe
 and view to
thier
of them or themselves
their
 own home country
,
Accept space
,
 which makes people to know more about
diffirent
unlike in nature or quality or form or degree
different
 countries and arrange a visit to there to know more about its culture
,
Accept space
,
habbits
an established custom
habits
 and way of living
.
Accept space
.
Linking Words
Furthermore there
Accept comma addition
Furthermore, there
 is a kind of stereotype for some countries that can be
easlriy
with ease ('easy' is sometimes used informally for 'easily')
easily
 changed
in
Suggestion
into
 that kind of
cermonies
a formal event performed on a special occasion
ceremonies
.
Accept space
.
Conclusion
For sure world stability is much more challenging subject
further
Linking Words
 than sports and games
,
Accept space
,
 but without any doubt those kind of events have a
postive
characterized by or displaying affirmation or acceptance or certainty etc.
positive
 effect on the people and communities
.
Accept space
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: