IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

International travel make people prejudiced rather than broad minded what are its causes and measures. What measures can be taken to solve this problem?

#travel #people #measures
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It is true that travelling across countries might make people judging on other cultures
instead
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 of broadening their horizons. There are several reasons for
this
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 tendency and steps which can be done to
further
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 improve people's knowledge of the places they have been to. Two main issues of the phenomenon include the natural characteristics of human and the propaganda of the long-history countries.
Firstly
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, the nature of humans is being proud of their hometown, rather than of a strange place which has not related to them.
For example
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, people could visit other villages with many even more interesting customs and traditions,
however
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, theirs are better.
Secondly
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, countries with long histories of construction and keeping the boundary out of other enemy’s eyes tend to educate their citizens about the glory of their motherlands. As a consequence, up to a point, their people would not want to discover other’s elites. There are several actions which both individuals and governments can do to tackle the problems. The best course of action for individuals is to be neutral.
In other words
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, they should bear in mind each culture has their own unique and no one is better or worse. The
second
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 step would be for governments to change the way of educating their residents. To put it simply, they should be told about the global village where a diversity of cultures is mostly unavoidable.
As a result
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, not only can people conserve their national identities, but
also
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 might widen their understanding on other country’s achievements. In conclusion, both national authorities and individuals play active roles in changing their attitudes toward the prejudicing other’s traditions, to understand well the places they visited.
Submitted by tip.lifesaver on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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