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Writing Samples
Band 6

In some countries young people are encouraged to work for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this

#countries #people #work #year #school #university #studies
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In recent years,
the young
Suggestion
younger
 generations are supported to take a gap
year
 after graduating high schools.
This
 essay will provide both benefits and drawbacks of
this
 trend. On the one hand, taking a
year
 out can offer beneficial effects on graduates. In the
first
 place, they can handle their financial problems.
For instance
, they can search for some jobs which not required
university
 degree
such
 as: nail-makers, beauticians, waiters. According to the survey of a newspaper in Vietnam (2015), the income of a beautician is nearly 40 million VND per month, which is higher five-times than an office staff’s income.
Additionally
, those who dropping
university
 can gain an enormous number of experiences and skills
from
Suggestion
of
 the gap
year
. Working volunteer in non-profitable organizations
is
Suggestion
are
 one salient example in
this
 situation. The students can make new friends, help people, learn
such
 skills as teamwork, time-management, interpersonal skills.
On the other hand
, skipping
university
 can have some drawbacks for students.
Firstly
, they cannot have a higher degree to look for white-
colar
a band that fits around the neck and is usually folded over
collar
 jobs
such
 as teachers, doctors, interpreters or translators.
For example
, in order to be a translator, the students have to study foreign languages and translation skills which cannot be provided
without
Suggestion
without a university
university
. The
second
 impact is that the students will lose their interest in studying and researching because of the relaxing
breaks
Suggestion
break
.
As a result
, they will experience a variety of obstacles to earn their living. In conclusion,
although
 taking a gap
year provides
Accept comma addition
year, provides
finances
Suggestion
finance
financing
 and experiences for students,
this
 trend can have bad effects on their study career.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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