Do you think women should join army or navy, expalin why

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One of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the cumulative increase in

women

Use synonyms

's recruitment in national forces. Some people believe that

ladies

Use synonyms

play a vital role in controlling crimes in the female population.

This

Linking Words

stance will be proven by carefully analysing why

girls

Use synonyms

are important for the brigades.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the main reason is that

women

Use synonyms

are reliable and dedicated to their work commitment towards the nation. These never mix up with any outer people like enemies or foreign detectors. Another factor is that these are well suitable for office work and maintaining a central database.

For example

Linking Words

, 70% of

girls

Use synonyms

are working in the Indian troops in information technology departments and those are responsible for keeping information safe and secure.

As a result

Linking Words

, many young

girls

Use synonyms

gravitate towards troops and navy divisions.

Secondly

Linking Words

, the primary reason is that nowadays, females fly fighter planes in different countries and perform well.

In addition

Linking Words

, in some cases, if the country needs these soldiers in wars, they play an important part in looking after enemy

women

Use synonyms

and it proves the kindness of the country towards the opposition.

For instance

Linking Words

, in the recent war between Israel and Gaza, Israel’s

women

Use synonyms

fighters fought against Gaza and handled Gaza’s females even protecting them from any gang rape incidents.

As a consequence

Linking Words

, it is apparent why the

ladies

Use synonyms

' army plays a successful role in saving the

girls

Use synonyms

from nasty elements. In conclusion, following the analysis,

it is clear that

Linking Words

every country needs

women

Use synonyms

soldiers to minimise mass care from the opposite sex people, where

ladies

Use synonyms

can communicate with

girls

Use synonyms

to prove war’s rules and regulations.

Further

Linking Words

, it is predicted that the recruitment of

ladies

Use synonyms

in the army and navy is going to continue in the future as well.

rbtech65Wed May 15 2024

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task achievement

To elevate the essay, ensure that your points are thoroughly broadened and connected. Expanding on ideas with extended arguments and elaborations will enhance clarity. Additionally, working on transitions between paragraphs will smooth the flow of the essay.

coherence cohesion

While the logical structure of the essay shows great promise, consider varying sentence structures and employing more complex linking words. This can help the flow and rhythm of the text, ensuring better connectivity between the ideas and paragraphs.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction is engaging and sets the tone for the discussion, while the conclusion effectively recaps the central ideas and provides a forward-looking statement.

supported main points

The essay presents specific examples, such as the involvement of Indian women in information technology departments and the Israeli conflict, which substantiates the arguments and lends credibility to the points made.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Do you think women should join army or navy, expalin why

Your opinion

Maintaining public libraries is a waste of money since computer technology can replace their functions. Do you agree or disagree?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of having a school uniform?

Televised talent shows have become popular in many societies today. Are these shows a good method of finding talented people, or are they just entertainment?

Most scientific inventions and discoveries are worthless and only waste of time and money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The rise of social media platforms has made it easier for people to vent their frustrations and complaints publicly. What is the consequence of this trend? Is there any benefit to expressing complaints on social media?