IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being over weight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society. How can this problem be solved.

Nowadays, our exposure to the electronic world has given us the opportunity to comment on the provided
services
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 and products, but
this
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 has some merits
as well as
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 certain drawbacks.
This
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 essay will discuss the negative and positive effects of
product
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 reviews.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are several reasons why writing a
product
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 review is important.
Firstly
Linking Words
, by commenting on a
product
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, others can go through these comments and gain the required information about it.
Linking Words
as
Capitalize word
As
show examples
 a result,
this
Linking Words
 will help other consumers to select the right
product
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 and ensure the money is not wasted for nothing.
For example
Linking Words
,
Amazon
Change noun form
Amazon's
show examples
 website
is providing
Wrong verb form
provides
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
consumers with a section to insert or read a comment which helps other consumers to choose the right
product
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.
Secondly
Linking Words
, by writing a comment about a
product
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 or
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services
Fix the agreement mistake
service
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 that has
completed
Add a missing verb
been completed
show examples
 in a perfect way, they do the marketing for the
product
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.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, the
product
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 will gain
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
huge success from
this
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 advertisement
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 will increase the demand
on
Change preposition
for
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 it.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, as there are positive sides
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 writing a comment about a
product
Use synonyms
, it has a negative side. To commence with, the internet
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 made the world connected and a small loophole in the quality of the
services
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 will impact the company and the
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product
Change noun form
product's
show examples
reputation.
The customers
Correct article usage
Customers
show examples
 can take
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advantage of the internet to express their dissatisfaction and share it with the whole world
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 a single click.
For instance
Linking Words
, many companies have lost their customer
due to
Linking Words
 bad service, which led to
shut
Change the verb form
shutting
show examples
 down the business.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a full
product
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 line could be impacted with small comments. Some customers list the side effects of a specific
product
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 where the interest of the
product
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 will be lost impacting the production of
this
Linking Words
product
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.
To sum up
Linking Words
, the internet provides
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
customers with a massive power to express their feedback.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 has many positive effects
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a
product
Use synonyms
 or
Use synonyms
services
Fix the agreement mistake
service
show examples
, it has negative sides that should not be ignored.

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task achievement
Make sure all your points are well supported with examples and explanations. Adding more details can help clarify your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your essay flows smoothly from one idea to the next. Use linking words like 'however', 'for example', and 'moreover' to connect your thoughts.
coherence and cohesion
Consider rewriting your introduction to briefly state the key points you will discuss in the essay. This helps readers understand your plan.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use varied sentence structures. Mixing short and long sentences can make your writing more engaging.
task achievement
You clearly identified both the positive and negative aspects of product reviews.
task achievement
The use of examples, such as the Amazon website, shows your understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • overweight
  • health problems
  • fast food
  • unhealthy
  • nutrition
  • screen time
  • physical activity
  • busy lifestyles
  • healthy meals
  • dietary choices
  • public spaces
  • exercising
  • marketing
  • advertising
  • appealing
  • cheaper
What to do next:
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