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Writing Samples
Band 6

Because of the busy pace of modern life, many children spend most of their time indoors and have little exposure to the natural world.

#pace #life #children #time #indoors #exposure #world
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Living in a modern hustle-bustle world narrowing interaction between children and
nature
. Compared with 50 years ago, nowadays they prefer to spend most of the
time
 using smartphone rather than playing outside.
However
,
this
 phenomenon has profound drawbacks for the intellectual and physical social development. Brain
cells improvement
Accept comma addition
cells, improvement
 for children proliferate rapidly during the
first
 five
year
Suggestion
years
. Interact with
nature
 can develop their intelligence since they are born as an innate scientist with inquisitive mind. Environment gives an open-ended learning laboratory for a child where they can explore and discover.
For instance
, by observing how butterfly experiences life cycle from caterpillar into a stunning butterfly, they could learn about metamorphosis. These will lead a child to become a creative, intelligent, and observant person. Open
nature
 is decent for children’s physic as they move their body during play
time
. Invigorate fresh air
also
 gives opportunity for them to exercise and do physical activities which is good for their lungs. At the same
time
, they can absorb vitamin D from the sun which is good for their bones and immune system.
Moreover
, active movement will burn more calories
hence
 will avoid from obesity.
Although
 myriad parents worry about the dangers of playing outside due to the virus, bacteria, or accident, the advantages of interact with
nature
 for
body
Suggestion
the body
 is overweight its disadvantages. To conclude, children need an interactive learning in a
nature
 as they grow up so that they will develop their intelligence and health. These will foster their balance improvement between brain and physic which is valuable for education. Once they becoming adults, they will have no
time
 for doing
such
 a thing since they have to spend their
time
 for work and career development.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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